Charcoal is Black

2012-01-25T13:25:00.002+08:00

i am very scared.
who else can i trust in this world?
i just hate being me and just hate being myself.
:'(

2011也要过了...

2011-12-18T17:25:00.004+08:00

假期已经两个星期,心中是悠闲的,脑海是空荡荡的.
我近来才越来越发现自己是有多么的渺小.
总以为自己付出的努力就应该要有所回报.
或许经历得不够深刻,历练得不够彻底,总以为自己做的已经很多了.
@@ 原来我错得很重啊!
有时侯,我很羡慕胖人,多希望自己和他们一样,什么都好,样样精通,然后应用这些知识在生活常识当中,得到想要的...得到期盼的...
可惜,我真的没有本,不能和他们平起平坐,真的觉得很自卑.
尤其是身旁的这些老朋友..
这种心理潜伏性地隐藏在心中很多年了,或许自己不晓得.
啊...天啊,可以让我好好挖掘自己吗??
说一句老套但万确真实的话,除了会读书(可有时侯也读到要死要活这样...),我还会干什么呢???
我难道还有嘴巴说说别人吗??
哈哈,对了,这副贱嘴巴,说话明明就是没有那个意思,可是有时侯就是阴差阳错让别人听成了另一番意思,然后就会引起误会,造成他人不开心,留着自己"WHAT?"的那种感受! @@
可能我太爱说笑了,我太爱酸人了,虽然我很没有用,可是我知道自己说话的极限应该要到达哪个地方的,这我绝对知道. @@ 可能自己就是有那种face problem... xD
这个社会讲求包装吧,所以大家心里有话却不想说,面对事情,总选择comforting lies > unpleasant truth.
我多不想说,我知道我应该做些事情,但却力不从心,所以就让我责备自己一下吧...
啊~我尽量不在乎人家怎么判断我,怎么看待我,所以又把压抑心里的一些话写写出来!!
我此刻就是一个想太多的男生. XD 好久好久没有酱子啰唆了,我的pattern又回来了!
虽然zap了一点,可是自己觉得,有时侯就是要讲多一点,提醒自己多一点,自己才会有那个力量继续往前走.

我有手有脚,四肢健全,虽然muscle不够其他人kiat,所以就会被看成很软弱.哇哈哈哈哈,啊,不在我控制内的事我管不了,但时时刻刻得提醒自己,是时候积极向上了!
aiya,每次口头说说nia,不知道几时自己才肯出头天.哈哈~

加油!!发泄过后,积极乐观最重要.=)

几霓料

2011-11-17T17:05:00.001+08:00

猴tia

2011-10-21T00:01:00.006+08:00

多少个秋多少个冬
我几乎快要被治愈好
但还是会只因为一个重覆的话题
就无心自扰
也曾想过
若真遇见我们应该如何是好
我想我还是会站在某一个街角
不让你看到
只因为我不想打扰
只因为怕你解释不了
只因为现在你的眼睛里
他比我还重要
我只好假装我看不到
看不到你和他在对街拥抱
你的快乐我可以感受得到
这样的见面方式对谁都好
我只好假装我听不到
听不到别人口中的她好不好
再不想问也不想被通知到
反正你的世界我管不了
只因为我不想打扰
只因为怕你解释不了
只因为现在你的眼睛里
他比我还重要
我只好假装我看不到
看不到你和他在对街拥抱
你的快乐我可以感受得到
这样的见面方式对谁都好
我只好假装我听不到
听不到别人口中的她好不好
再不想问也不想被通知到
反正你的世界我管不了
若不想问若不想被通知到
就把祝福留在街角...
17/11/2010，就快要一年了.....

发人省思

2011-10-12T21:06:00.001+08:00

1、一个人有生就有死，但只要你活着，就要以最好的方式活下去。
2、当我们失去的时候，才知道自己曾经拥有。
3、记住该记住的，忘记该忘记的。改变能改变的，接受不能改变的。
4、眼泪的存在，是为了证明悲伤不是一场幻觉。
5、妈妈说过没有人值得你为他哭，唯一值得你为他哭的那个人，永远都不会让你为他哭。 6、两人相爱时，渴求无限甜蜜的吻，但为何在争吵时，却要用接吻的嘴互相伤害呢？
7、幸福像掉到沙发下面的一粒纽扣--你专心找，怎么也找不到，等你淡忘了它自己就滚出来。
8、眼泪的温度有530℃，只是因为外面的世界太冷，流出来的时候才会降到53℃。
9、宠和爱是不同的两件事，宠可以没有交流，而爱则不能。
10、人生试题一共有四道题目：学业、事业、婚姻、家庭。平均分高才能及格，切莫花太多的时间和精力在任一题目上。
11、鱼说：你看不见我的眼中的泪，因为我在水里；水说：我能感受到你的泪，因为你在我心里。
12、人生在世，应该这样，在芬芳别人的同时美丽自己。
13、只需一分钟就可以碰到一个人，一小时喜欢上一个人，一天爱上一个人，但需要花尽一生的时间去忘掉一个人。
14、发光并非太阳的专利，你也可以发光。
15、人只要不失去方向，就不会失去自己！人生重要的不是所站的位置，而是所朝的方向。 16、每一件事都要用多方面的角度来看它。
17、理想的路总是为有信心的人预备着。
18、快乐要懂得分享，才能加倍的快乐。这也是三峡在线之所以总是在"盘点生活，分享经典"的理由。
19、抱最大的希望，为最大的努力，做最坏的打算。
20、生活中若没有朋友，就像生活中没有阳光一样。
21、一个人有生就有死，但只要你活着，就要以最好的方式活下去。
22、要做的事情总找得出时间和机会，不要做的事情总找得出借口。
23、令人不能自拔的，除了牙齿还有爱情。
24、爱情就像一双袜子，越是瞧起来不顺眼的袜子，越有可能永远陪在你身边，越是喜欢的漂亮袜子经常会少一只。
25、我们缺少的不是机会，而是在机会面前将自己重新归零的勇气。 26、微小的幸福就在身边，容易满足就是天堂。
27、没有人因水的平淡而厌倦饮水，也没有人因生活的平淡而摒弃生活。
28、思恋一个人的滋味就像喝了一大杯冰水，然后用很长很长的时间流成热泪。
29、得不到你所爱的，就爱你所得的。
30、日出东海落西山，愁也一天，喜也一天；遇事不钻牛角尖，人也舒坦，心也舒坦。
31、失因为贪--说真的，老实人很少上当。
32、当你能飞的时候就不要放弃飞；当你能梦的时候就不要放弃梦；当你能爱的时候就不要放弃爱。
33、家！甜蜜的家！天下最美好的莫过于家。
34、如果敌人让你生气，那说明你还没有胜他的把握。如果朋友让你生气，那说明你仍然在意他的友情。 35、有些事情本身我们无法控制，只好控制自己。
36、聪明人是快乐的，自以为聪明的才烦恼。帮助别人减轻三分烦恼，自己就会享受七分快乐。
37、流言造成伤害至少需要两个人--你的敌人诋毁你，你的朋友转告你。
38、美好的生命应该充满期待、惊喜和感激。
39、最快乐的人并不是一切东西都是最好的，但他们会充分享受自己已有的东西。
40、自己要先看得起自己，别人才会看得起你。
41、假如一千个人从我身边踏过的，我也能听出你的脚步声，因为999个人的脚是踏在地上，只有你的脚步声是踏在我的心上。
42、生命太过短暂，今天放弃了明天不一定能得到。
43、每天告诉自己一次：我真的很不错。　
44、要铭记在心：每天都是一年中最美好的日子。
45、爱的力量大到可以使人忘记一切，却又小到连一粒嫉妒的沙石也不能容纳。
46、爱一个人而那个人不爱你是很让人难受的，但更痛苦的是，爱一个人，却永远都没勇气告诉他。
47、后悔是一种耗费精神的情绪。后悔是比损失更大的损失，比错误更大的错误，所以请不要后悔。
48、每个人都有潜在的能量，只是很容易：被习惯所掩盖，被时间所迷离，被惰性所消磨。
49、能冲刷一切的除了眼泪，就是时间，以时间来推移感情，时间越长，冲突越淡，仿佛不断稀释的茶。
50、有勇气并不表示恐惧不存在，而是敢面对恐惧、克服恐惧。
51、生气是拿别人做错的事来惩罚自己。
52、人若软弱就是自己最大的敌人；人若勇敢就是自己最好的朋友。
53、要纠正别人之前，先反省自己有没有犯错。　
54、少一点预设的期待，那份对人的关怀会更自在。　
55、最好的朋友是你们静坐在游廊上，一句话也不说，当你们各自走开的时候，仍感到你们经历了一场十分精彩的对话。
56、人的价值，在遭受诱惑的一瞬间被决定。　
57、有理想在的地方，地狱就是天堂。有希望在的地方，痛苦也成欢乐。
58、人总是珍惜未得到的，而遗忘了所拥有的。
59、用最少的悔恨面对过去。用最少的浪费面对现在。用最多的梦面对未来。　
60、青春一经典当即永不再赎。
61、爱情是以微笑开始，以吻生长，以泪结束。
62、得意时应善待他人，因为你失意时会需要他们。
63、所有的胜利，与征服自己的胜利比起来，都是微不足道。所有的失败，与失去自己的失败比起来，更是微不足道。　
64、一千个人就有一千种生存方式和生活道路，要想改变一些事情，首先得把自己给找回来。
65、在这个尘世上，虽然有不少寒冷，不少黑暗，但只要人与人之间多些信任，多些关爱，那么，就会增加许多阳光。
66、假如我不能，我一定要；假如我一定要，我就一定能。
67、一个能从别人的观念来看事情，能了解别人心灵活动的人，永远不必为自己的前途担心。
68、把你的脸迎向阳光，那就不会有阴影。
69、真正的爱，应该超越生命的长度、心灵的宽度、灵魂的深度。
70、你以为最酸的感觉是吃醋吗？不是的，最酸溜溜的感觉是没权吃醋，根本就轮不到你吃醋，那就是最酸最酸的。
71、死亡教会人一切，如同考试之后公布的结果--虽然恍然大悟，但为时晚矣！
72、你是你的敌人，只有你才能打倒你；你是你的上帝，只有你才能拯救你。
73、上帝从不埋怨人们的愚昧，人们却埋怨上帝的不公平。
74、世界上有两种人：索取者和给予者。前者也许能吃得更好，但后者绝对能睡得更香。
75、上帝从不埋怨人们的愚昧，人们却埋怨上帝的不公平。
76、要让事情改变，先改变我自己；要让事情变得更好，先让自己变得更好。
77、人要有三平心态：平和、平稳、平衡。对自己要从容，对朋友要宽容，对很多事情要包容，这样才能活的比较开心。
78、不要对挫折叹气，姑且把这一切看成是在你成大事之前，必须经受的准备工作。
79、每一个人都拥有生命，但并非每个人都懂得生命，乃至于珍惜生命。不了解生命的人，生命对他来说，是一种惩罚。
80、请你用慈悲心和温和的态度，把你的不满与委屈说出来，别人就容易接受。
81、你出生的时候，你哭着，周围的人笑着；在生命的尽头，你笑着，而周围的人在哭着。 82、伟人之所以伟大，是因为他与别人共处逆境时，别人失去了信心，他却下决心实现自己的目标。
83、你要包容那些意见跟你不同的人，这样子日子比较好过。你要是一直想改变他，那样子你会很痛苦。要学学怎样忍受他才是。你要学学怎样包容他才是。
84、良心是每一个人最公正的审判官，你骗得了别人，却永远骗不了你自己的良心。
85、什么时候也不要放弃希望，越是险恶的环境越要燃起希望的意志。
86、积极的人在每一次忧患中都看到一个机会，而消极的人则在每个机会都看到某种忧患。
87、许多人企求着生活的完美结局，殊不知美根本不在结局，而在于追求的过程。
88、定期去检查身体吧，别等最后别人送你去。三峡在线真诚提醒你。
89、影响我们人生的绝不仅仅是环境，其实是心态在控制-个人的行动和思想。同时，心态也决定了一个人的视野、事业和成就，甚至-生。
90、健康源于心，积极心态像太阳，照到哪里哪里亮；消极心态像病毒，传到哪里哪遭殃。
91、第一个青春是上帝给的；第二个的青春是靠自己努力的。
92、也许有些人很可恶，有些人很卑鄙。而当我设身为他想象的时候，我才知道：他比我还可怜。所以请原谅所有你见过的人，好人或者坏人。
93、一句无心的话也许会点燃纠纷，一句残酷的话也许会毁掉生命，一句及时的话也许会消释紧张，一句知心的话也许会愈合伤口、挽救他人。
94、生命---就是一个逐渐支出和利用时间的过程。一旦丧失了时间，生命也就走到了尽头。
95、没有口水与汗水，就没有成功的泪水。
96、世上并没有用来鼓励工作努力的赏赐，所有的赏赐都只是被用来奖励工作成果的。
97、当你感到悲哀痛苦时，最好是去学些什么东西。学习会使你永远立于不败之地。
98、世界上只有一样东西是任何人都不能抢走的，那就是智慧。
99、如果你希望成功，以恒心为良友，以经验为参谋，以小心为兄弟，以希望为哨兵。
100、一切伟大的行动和思想，都有一个微不足道的开始。

咖讨朦

2011-09-09T17:38:00.003+08:00

那天是阔别了六个星期后再一次去到理发店剪头发去哦，所以想想可知当时的头发是有几长！
还是一样的理发师帮我剪。。。剪剪剪也剪到我眼睛呆住镜子中的自己放空去了~
一直到。。。

“哇~~~我碧要我碧要我碧要我碧要~~~（现在的小孩子都是酱紫念我不要的啦！！哈哈）”
“Boy~ 你乖，阿姨给你糖糖ok？不会痛的~”
“哇！！！！！我碧要！！！！！”

第二次的哇和接下来的哭声呢，是尖到某一种程度的说。
话说隔壁的肉骨茶点的人纷纷都跑来门前围观看什么事发生了。
当时就坐在那小孩隔壁的我，想要关耳朵却又不能，理发师也顾着帮我剪而已。
哇唠，讲真，现在的小孩子比起我们那个年代越来越会喊，丹田很有力，强！
在最后连糖果以及他妈妈的“quiet boy quiet boy~”的order都无法见效果的时候，他们只好放弃，下次再来剪。-.-

一旁等候的妈，突然抛出一句说：
“阿尼款北塞Eh~dia dio爱咖伊俩调调来咖~”（一定要抓紧紧来剪）
“股咋瓦朗kor kia马西阿尼款~”（以前我们照顾小孩也是这样款）
可惜妈妈爱子心切，不忍心看到自己的boy boy喊道酱，只好很不好意思地向老板娘告辞，说下次等他睡觉了再来。LOL，当今小孩子会笨到睡觉时候被剪头发时不懂吗？？我想他们听到那个机器的声音都怕到发抖了吧！O.O

结果呢，帮我剪的理发师听到妈妈这样一讲，在一旁偷笑一下。（被我抓包了哇哈哈）
随之抛出来问我的竟然是，
“你妈妈讲到酱，你小时候有喊到酱够力吗？？”

吃到阿尼大汗，以前细汗对剪头发这一事害怕与否我应该不晓得了吧。
所以只好告诉她。。。
哇麻捺栽？？？

也许是自己懂得牌写，回家路途中仔细一想，小时候好像没有糖果我是不肯剪头发的哦...=P

登嘉楼之旅

2011-09-05T20:53:00.009+08:00

今天的时间呢，大部分都花在浏览人家的部落格以及自己真的很懒惰很懒惰的情况下给荒废掉鸟。有时候真讨厌自己那么浪费时间！但是我总是相信你浪费得很得意，浪费得很潇洒的时间并不是浪费得，哈哈哈~~什么鸟话。就好像今天浏览那么多部落格，突然间找到一点灵感，扣劈(copy)人家的风格来展露自己的故事~~~

10几天假期以来，值得一提的就是和妈妈那边的亲戚一同到瓜拉登嘉楼去出席尾叔公尾叔婆娶媳妇的大日子啦！那天9月1日一大清早，从被窝中爬起梳洗后就到八叔公的家等候巴士。巴士一路上摇摇晃晃，整个早上下午都荒废在巴士里面。。。睡觉，做梦，发呆，听歌。。。九个小时之后才抵达目的地！所以呢，基本上呢，在这三天两夜的旅行（也不算啥旅行啦），一天就这样要过去了，唯独到了晚上我们去尾叔公的家享用婚宴前一天的自助餐。

人家说，“有缘千里来相会，无缘见面打瞌睡”！在这么大老远的地方居然还可以遇上中学时期的老师哦。而且这个老师不简单，03年时候教过我哥，07年时候教过我，10年时候教过表妹，所以呢我们三个人看到她就“嗨！老师，”，然后呢，因为这个老师自己是一对双胞胎，自己心里想想不可能会在这么大老远的地方遇到自己的同学哦，所以她说：“你们教的不是我不是我，应该是她。”哈哈哈~解释了一番之后她才明白~~~缘分就是这样奥妙吧！！！

第二天早上，因为尾叔公的家庭是基督徒，所以我们就到基督教堂里见证这段婚姻！

第一次在基督教堂见证婚礼哦，就好像拍戏安尼款哦，很北灌洗，首先听听神父（应该是这样叫吧？）讲讲道理，然后他也给这对新人几句奉劝的话，相当有意思的，什么“爱情路上，爱情难免会减少，也许过了好几年你们之间也没有所谓的爱情，但那并不是爱情的终点，不是爱情的坟墓，因为你们两个存在的是永无止境的感情......”噢，lam死人了，不过我觉得挺赞的！哈哈哈哈~

这个小子，特别想要提的，就是我顽皮的表弟。妈说这张照片他看起来十足十像他爸爸哦，就是我舅舅啦，不过也当然啦，他老北生的一定像他老北啦，不然像我的老北咩。哈哈。话说，他今年五年级，照理说11岁，就是2000年的北鼻，那时我才七岁，舅舅说他会在三月出世，我还不懂几希望他就和我同一天酱，哈哈，单纯到不行，不过呢他生日早我六天啦。生出来的时候确实蛮可水的，因为他出世时就住在外婆家，基本上我每天都会去那边，可惜他才八个月大酱父母就离婚了，然后他和他姐姐就跟妈妈住了，所以很少见面。除了过年之外一年应该也只见个两三次吧，而且话题不多，毕竟岁数差个不小，所以呢见面时也只能和他们玩玩啦。

还记得他大概两三年级的时候，那时偶尔还会见面，不过亲戚对他那顽皮的一面都有一点担心啦，因为屁股痒，每天跳东跳西，爬来爬去，长大后担心这个gin那很会趴趴皂。尤其前两年我们还jio麦他一起到合艾旅行时，从他嘴巴出来的满是脏话，怕惊他的阿公阿妈。不过还好这趟和他去登嘉楼好像有改变了哦，也许gin那仔长大了慢慢会想了，不过还是很ged肖。。。但也无形中为这趟旅行增添了许多欢乐。哈哈哈哈~~

为什么会无端端提到他呢，嗯。。。。。。突然感叹岁月不留人啦，11年就酱紫过去料。

妈妈side的家族又多一名kaki郎啦~~~~

妈说：“仨A 金娜kia卡迪迪跨料金格演（三个小孩站到直直看料真过瘾）”
我却想说啊，我也十八岁料，今年过料就要十九料。可是好像没什么长进酱。。。怎么我的想法和老人家调换了过来。哈哈哈

晚上的结婚典礼才是经典。除了有好听的live band以外，司仪还逗了新郎官一顿，突然间叫他致词窝，感觉得到新郎官手接过麦克风的时候是有多么的无言，哈哈哈。不过他也说的蛮好的，说着说着说道感激父母的时候突然就哽咽，巴寇昂昂料，然后尾叔婆也拿低俗漆巴塞，过后妈妈也跟着漆，笑死了，不过确实是蛮感动的啦，新郎官（也是我的...表舅？）送礼物给老北老布，基督家庭的人就是那么懂得惜福感恩，值得学习。有点感伤的是看到舅舅舅母跟着滴眼屎，我想是想起如果自己儿子还健在的话应该这一天也就不远了吧。。。唉。。。人生金甲洗五金嘴无奈。。。=(

不要提起伤心事。。。左边那个就是顽皮肥肉表弟的姐姐啦，相当欣慰的说，虽然父母离异而没有住在一起，可是偶尔这样聚一聚可以增进感情，其实是很不错的。中间那个就是外婆啦，从这里看确实很孝廉哦。。。右边那个也就是和左边那个同龄的表妹啦。。。

喜酒过后我们到瓜拉登嘉楼附近的海滩走走散散步，不过那时也已经是十一点多了，听起来有点恐怖~！CHOI la k，中秋节来临吗，去海滩看月亮看浪潮过瘾过瘾一下吗。然后就来张大合照咯，也蛮吓到的啦，有些没有见过的亲戚在这趟旅行也跟来料，就好像我自己也不知道自己也有一个在苏邦的11岁和14岁的表弟。。。不过老实说，他们看起来很大，好像还大过我酱。。。哈哈哈哈。

第三天早上我们又浩浩荡荡回家去啦，其实我本人很喜欢这种旅行的。第一又可以为自己找理由来浪费时间，第二又可以看看自己的亲戚到底有多广，看看世界有几大~哈哈哈~而且久久一次这样增进感情真的是很不错啦，毕竟现在都是老辈老布安排的旅游，他们也是要和自己同辈的亲戚聚聚一下联络感情，以后他们老料谁来安排？？？就是由我们这些晚辈了咯，所以认识认识下，以后讲话也不会尴尬~~哈哈。所以很期待下一次的旅行！（虽然瓜拉登嘉楼是蛮显的说）

好啦，更多照片自己去facebook找，不写了，整天都在浪费时间到有一点对自己心寒料。( ⊙o⊙ ) 所以是时候收拾心情去做功课！！！今天只是突然发桥想写写华语字。哈哈。得空的话明天再写！！！

自己选的路，就算跪下也得走下去

2011-08-20T22:09:00.003+08:00

我们总以为，十八岁意味着我们长大了，任何决定自己得来处理了。
所以，总是懵懵懂懂，老是持着一个像斗牛的野蛮态度，认为关键时候自己的决定就战胜一切。
其实，十八岁，真的是个那么理性的年纪让你来作主，让你来决定吗？

十八岁的我们一点都还不够成熟，尤其是现在，有好多好多的关键事等待着我们去决定它的去向，我们更是凭着自身很多经验的老样子来做定论，然而错失了机会，但从中间学会了某些事，累计人生经验从而再长大... etc etc and etc...

最近还是那幅老样子，太多太多老人家思想了。
朋友都说每次和我提起这种“人生看法”事，不知不觉自己就会emo上来了。
哈哈，只想说，大家都有冲动的时候，大家都有自以为自己的决定对的时候，然而到了最后，越是觉得自己非常的对，越是有那个自打嘴巴的时候...

行事时，多听取劝告，理性些。但千万不要紧紧跟着别人的忠告，到了最后，你也是要选择自己的路，为自己负责人。毕竟就有那么一句歌词，

[别人说的话，随便听一听，自己做决定]

与此，共勉之。

人生中第二个后悔？

2011-08-15T21:41:00.002+08:00

在我有生以来，直至今年第十八年，足以让我好几个月都无法释怀的人生事，只有两件。
从第一件的经验，我学会了任何事情要当机立断，不要踌躇，认为自己应该争取的，马上上前去，不是空等，不是在一旁期待，然而机会就这样被人抓走了... 只能埋怨自己的胆小以及懵懂。我学会了。
我就这样把第一件后悔事的经验应用在人生里，认为不对就马上采取行动，设好认为是对自己好的一条路，却没想到，我这就造成第二项后悔。我是太冲动了吗？也许我就是真的任性吧，我就是给人家带来那么多“不确定”感。我，也许又被说中了一次... ='((

我很不想很不想去承认，但，是得，我这就后悔了...
人的本性就是这样，失去的时候才懂得什么叫珍惜！突然好想为自己赏两巴掌！='((
但，还记得自己说过，作了决定不管好的坏的都会自己撑下去了，不会再有任何埋怨...
所以我会履行自己的承诺，我不会辜负你们的...
让我找到正能量继续走下去吧！！！
坚持吧，蠢蛋！='))

有这么一种感觉

2011-07-24T23:56:00.003+08:00

家里好吵。
有些时候真的好不想理这里的东西。
因为这些事情，此时此刻，心里又开始想起自己做错了决定。
当初就应该乖乖得什么念什么就算了...至少几个星期回来一趟，耳根清静些？
=(
不要吵，OK 吗？

快乐就好

2011-07-18T00:00:00.002+08:00

好几个星期下来，对自己与其周遭的人事物又有了新的看法。
对任何事都好，钻牛角尖并不是最好的办法。
发觉有些事情，只要你没那么执著，其实它也不会怎么影响你的人生。
每个人生存都有一定的烦恼，都有一定的问题。
为什么有些人就是可以那么淡定到某种程度 - 你认为这个人没啥烦恼，做人很幸运！
而为什么又有些人就是那么容易受到打击 - 这个人好惨啊，那么多问题！

原来啊，人的心智和心志确实扮演着人生中重大的角色。
有时候leh，说回来那句，做人呢不要酱会算，不要酱计较，不要酱执著，当下有的是什么，就珍惜什么；当下存在的价值有哪些，就趁早去珍惜哪些，总好过来日方长，时后以为自己回首过去的悔恨，却又再发现自己错失当下的宝贵，也已经来得太迟。

hehe，人生会有几个十年leh？
还是趁有生之年散播快乐开朗的气息吧！

少讲话，多做事

2011-07-15T23:55:00.002+08:00

好不喜欢解释东西。

:[

2011-07-12T21:07:00.002+08:00

I rate myself today 1/10.

BAD DECISION MAKER!!

One month

2011-07-11T20:54:00.004+08:00

得放下自己，融入自己了。
原来一个月也已经在多次回首中，茫茫过去。

Somehow what my Thinking Skills lecturer told is correct.
"What is the worst thing you can ever do, when you are just about 300 meter from the finishing line in a marathon race?"
----- It's not about tripping or slowing down, but it is the crucial moment when you are looking other participants that are running behind you.

kindofhectic,imightdropthinkingskills.D:

Reminiscing & Contemplating

2011-07-01T01:02:00.008+08:00

Reminiscing
How would life be if I graduate as a Civil Engineer?
Maybe I'll get a great job offer from Petronas? Maybe I'll get no jobs in future? Maybe I'll realize that "Uh Ohhh Thank God you make me a Civilian!"? Maybe... etc.
How would life be if I am determined enough to accept my offer, and stick to UTP?
Maybe I already blend in myself into the multi-races society? Maybe I have my own Kingdom there already? Maybe I am living happily with my new friends there? Maybe I enjoy my life a lot? Maybe I am still thinking about how unfair life is? Maybe... etc.

About 20 days of staying in UTP, and I actually made quite a number of friends, feel glad to know them in fact. And this is my 21st day left from UTP too, somehow I still question myself with the questions I stated. I know, I am clear with myself, for now at least, that I am supposed to move on with my own decision, no regrets, yeah, I guess I have no regrets now, but I am a person who likes reminiscing the past and remembering the unwanted facts. If you know me well you'll know me. ;D

So how are you all friends?? XD Well, it's the 3rd week since I left UTP, Jason, you know what you gonna do!!! XD just joking! ;D

I miss the musical night actually. I miss the CE lectures but mostly on friends actually. I miss the GoodNight from Itt Ping every night! I even remember that smell from Jason/Ah Kueh's room!! And the cats in UTP! Tap Tap Revenge 3 from Sujev Iphone!! Dinner every night with friends! And etc which I don't feel like to state as it would make me fall into another deep thought. xD LOL.

Contemplating
What if, I never apply for the UTP admission and pay for the RM20?
Get a better offer? Or worse?
What if, I applied Pharmacy course as well for the PIDN?
Maybe I'll end up in UCSI? Taylors Lakeside? Well I'd prefer the former one IDK why. Or even PILN? At least no more frustration like, too many branches for Engineering course till that I did not get what I actually want?
What if, I filled my form with a lower salary?
Will I secure my scholarship better?
What if, I went doing Form 6?
Just random, how would life be? XD

Well, I already accepted the truth. In fact long ago. Like how my previous posts sound. It was about one week after the scholarship announced. Life is still toooooooooooooooooooooo long for now, this is the first step for me to realize how unfair life could be, but yeah, this is just the beginning. I had been too stupid all this while to keep reminiscing and contemplating on all the predicaments which I created on my own, that caused myself to live in a misery for about a month? Maybe I am just a pure emotional/sentimental guy, even though I joke a lot. XD Did I actually mention in the previous posts that I will be doing A Level in Sunway UC starting 4th July?

Lackadaisical, already lose my idea to think of a better content to write. Often I typed, a whole page of content, and then I erased, I typed, erased, and things repeat every night, I do not know why I did so, guess that I am truly not-that-familiar with blogging anymore. xD

Well... I know I'm late but, it is really funny and hilarious to look how people create wordings using the Y U NO MEME GENERATOR. xD I created one long ago but it wasn't that nice as many others did. Hahahaha. Some people named it as #foreveralone guy instead of Y U NO guy. In actuality when people post a picture using the Y U NO guy, basically you know there are some shits happening on them.

No, I'm just being bored. No shit is happening on me so no worries!!! XD

keep your faith

2011-06-27T01:40:00.000+08:00

Time to move forward

2011-06-25T01:16:00.000+08:00

Accept the change and everything.

Y U NO CHEAP? D:

2011-06-21T12:13:00.001+08:00

I so wanna watch so many movies before I go to my college!
But heck,

WHY IS CINEMA TICKET SO EXPENSIVE?
WHY U NO CHEAP? D:

i'm out of budget!!!!!

0.5 of 2011

2011-06-19T18:07:00.004+08:00

Some of the things just don't go right for me within these two years.
Heck yeah I still manage to survive. XD
Well, I believe there are many many challenges await, and I'm preparing myself to face the upcoming challenges! D:

LOLOL, all the best to everyone. ;)
其实自己也好像很久没有真正快乐起来了... 谁可以听我？:(

两头不到岸

2011-06-18T17:38:00.009+08:00

一个月后，我选择放弃奖学金，宁愿自己束紧腰带花钱读书，也不愿意向命运低头，接受自己所得的一切。

我想，解释就是掩饰。
我应该不必解释那么多。
简单一句，自己没有胆向土木工程系前进。

我还以为，自己虽然得的不是什么海外奖学金，但至少我得了！
减轻了家人的负担，我成长了！至少也做对了一件事，好像很有成就这样，哈哈。

故事的最后，自己还是放弃了。我换不到自己要的course，怎么换也换不到，从学府，跑到来sponsorship，都是两句NO。虽然起初是想向sponsorship换另外一所学府，但获知失败之后就申请在同一所学府但换course，岂知也不能？！
学府就说：“你是scholar，不是说换就换，除非你有black and white from你的sponsorship。”
sponsorship就说：“满了就满了啊，选择别的吧，难不成你要让我和你的学府，因为你而我们两方闹得不愉快吧？”（会有这样夸张咩其实？@@）

因而采取这个行动。我不知道这样的做法其实对还是错。也许我就像是家人的内心想法那般吧--正在耍任性。=(

朋友们，再见了！只认识短短的三个星期，但我很感谢你们所给予的帮助！毕竟我是迟来报道的，不懂很多事。hehe。

选择这条路，应该粉碎了很多远亲近亲的心吧，虽然当我萌生起这念头的时候，妈妈不忍播电问问近亲远亲，大都说不要放弃，因为那是很好的offer。可惜...

心里很乱lah总之。

很对不起，我想我的决定让很多对我有期望的人失望了。

18岁的黑色星期五

2011-05-20T02:24:00.006+08:00

失落的一个星期就这样过了。
我还以为这会是一个漫长的光阴，却没想到我还是欣然接受了。
从一开始的，短暂的难过，到后来的“哎呀，不要紧啦，花钱读书咯”，到知晓我不应该那么败家的那阵痛楚，然后徘徊于上诉或不上诉的诱惑，进而衍生出我想要逃避，到现在的释怀感，我费时一个星期。

刚刚的晚上11:50pm，我clicked了selesai，也决定我人生接下来的五年的里程碑。
也许这会是好事，至少我不会后悔吧，因为我并没有所谓的“选择”后悔。哈哈。我只是获得一个奖学金，所以问题出在“接受”与“拒绝”之间。既然拒绝，要耗那么大笔钱来读书是不可能的事，我还犹豫什么，我还动摇什么呢？

有时候觉得我自己真的很好笑。LOL

记得5.30pm，在greenbox里面的电脑知道自己的成绩的时候，整个人有种“这是我的offer咩”的感觉，到后来认证一切，才发现自己的希望是那么的落空。原来我从来都没有料想自己最坏的打算，一直以来都满怀希望，所以那天跌得很深，伤得很重，越夜越痛，我彻夜难眠，当知道身边的朋友获得的都是比较好的... 再回想自己当初为了SPM，拼死拼活，预考期间还因为失眠吞了几小小颗的安眠药（原来我好恐怖！），还要得到了SPM佳绩的兴奋感、荣誉感，哈，我换来了这个...？那3月23日那天算什么？一切真的就像冠翔说的，如浮云！

那一天，那一个晚上，家人，尤其是父母纷纷也是气愤不已，怎么人生可以那么不公平。大家都忙着说气话，干脆不要了。岂知，第二天醒来的时候，妈妈趁我朦胧意识的状态中告诉我，欣然接受吧，其实，那也不是什么烂offer。

当第二天来临时，越来越多人check到自己的结果，回想起来，自己的offer也没有那么烂... 看见报章一个女生和我相同的成绩，因为想要攻读精算学可惜只获得本地大学，因而上诉。哈哈，这时心里的魔鬼开始告诉自己，嗯！你应得的！快点去上诉！所以自己也噼里啪啦忙着找马华，忙着找JPA HQ，来为自己的不公平奋斗。

星期一，在马青那儿submit了表格，以及其他的 supporting documents，我换来的却是“讲真的，你的offer很不错了咯，比起那些matriks还是diploma的... 所以你的chance very very very slim罢了，有个心理准备吧！”

那时心里好像有一点点跌入谷底，但是我也只是假装微微笑告诉她，“对...我知道...我知道...我只是想试试看能不能获得更好的offer...”。那天，带着一种“好吧，我认命！”的心情，到 Kumon担任最后一天的执教老师... 沉淀于工作真的可以让人忘却不开心！！=D

星期二，再从友人那儿听见，“快去JPA上诉！去了 JPA真的比较不一样！”恶魔又再占据我的心，“嗯，再准备一份像去马华的，再奋斗一次！” 所以呢，星期三又和爸爸妈妈在Putrajaya兜了一大圈，在9.30am抵达目的地，一直到1pm才做好我的上诉。结果？验收？待定。一切都要等到看有几个人拒绝了奖学金的offer，才能做打算。所以呢，心里也没有抱着太大的打算...

星期三下午，新闻终于展开火势的攻击了，部长也说了几句为我们这些奋斗着人生不公平的人应该争取的话。嗯，一名砂拉越的女生，10A+，仅获得matriculation，被访问时委屈得哭了。虽然我的成绩没她那么标青，也许课外活动也没她那么优秀，可是却深深感同身受，原来自己还是那么难过...

星期四，马华的人播电过来，询问了一些问题，像是现在得到了什么offer，然后先是劝我不要接受先，因为也许截至日期会延长，到后来叫我，还是接受吧，因为截至日期应该是不会延长了。所以自己又再一次陷入一片黑暗之中。“原来我还有选择不要接受的地步吗？” “我这回还有希望逃过这个offer”？一整天也开始忙着开银行户口，剪头发，做其他的准备功夫。当儿，我播电给我被派去的那所大学，询问了一些东西，岂料那接电的女生很不客气，说话带刺，好难听，把我本来就因为得到不是自己理想的大学的心情弄得更糟糕。再想想星期一马华说的，你的希望很slim了... 恨不得自己获得的是 matriks，还是 diploma，一来我转换奖学金的机会比较高，二来，我想到了最坏的打算（上诉失败），我也不会接受吧... 所以被那个渺小的电话员奚落一番，整个人心情很down... 而妈妈在这天，也忙着找叔公还有其他朋友，看看还有什么办法“伸冤”。

晚上，哥哥也从大学回来了，心情也开始好转起来，也许待我到上课的时候就应该不会常回来了，所以特别珍惜团聚的时光。整个晚上待在客厅，听着家人重复这个星期的课题... 这一次，我没有待在电脑面前数小时，只管听听家人的意见、聊聊天。唉。就知道自己会这样，等到快要出去外面一个人的时候才懂得珍惜。但是，我已经十八岁了，要学会独立了！所以我慢慢接受，慢慢调适自己的独立心态...

这一个星期以来，发现人生是那么的不公平，发现自己两年以来的运气其实是那么的糟糕，好像什么事情，不是学业而已，都没有那么顺利。找到负面的同时虽然很难过，时光很难熬，免不了自己会一直逼问自己一句没有答案的“为什么”... 那种心酸，以及为了SPM奋斗的那种辛酸的成正比，我发现，其实自己也有了另外一番的体会。

感谢这场痛，所以让我大开眼界，我又再渐渐的感受到其实读书真的没那么重要，努力之后一切还是要靠运气，所以并没有必要把自己折磨到如此。我因而才会享受人生。

感谢这场痛，所以让我了解人生。人生如意的事情太少了，也许这两年来面对的都不是什么成功的滋味，但没有了这些痛，我不会活到今天。熬过了它，我总算又长大了，又坚强了，开始对人生真谛有了另一种防备。同样的下一次，我想我应该会比较理性地面对了。

感谢这场痛，它让我的人生里程碑有了不一样的奇遇。一个从来自己想都没有想过，甚至对它嗤之以鼻的大学，却会变成人生接下来五年的家。我也许在一个小康之家会获得比较快乐吧？

很谢谢爸爸妈妈特地抽空陪我疯狂一个星期，虽然这些上诉看起来遥不可及，但你们还是很没有怨言的带我四处跑，为了找马华，为了找JPA HQ还迷路了，而且爸爸还拿了leave。我很感激，但我不知道该怎么说，希望你们明白。爸爸为了带我四处跑却没有半句怨言的功劳，还有妈妈不辞劳苦的一直播电询问，找寻其他办法，我深深烙印在我心底。无论结果如何，我也会乐观面对的！更会尽自己的本分来为家庭奋斗！（会尽最大努力不再抱着太大压力 xD） =D

很谢谢两个哥哥，让我有个防备心，让我好好欣然接受眼前的这一切，以及所分享的经验。对，或许它是一所本地大学，或许它就是那么的渺小，但在你羡慕人家获得本地私立大学，还是出国深造的，他们总有一天，也许会羡慕你能够留在马来西亚。还有你们所谓的，读什么科系都会读到sien的，都会有放弃的念头的，所以获得什么就读什么，撑过你就会好了。以及，你们所说的，进入大学之后，才了解原来什么大学都是一样的.... ~.~ 我知道，你们知道我不知道你们的知道，但我知道总有一天我也会知道的。所以我相信你们。=D

当然还有朋友不断的慰问与鼓励。也许我显得太脆弱了。我知道你们也不知道该说什么好，但不慰问，还是不鼓励，你们觉得很不像样吧。哈哈。也许这个情况我很了解你们，只可惜也许你们比较难了解这种感受，但我明白，绝对不会责怪你们。=) 我也是很感谢你们的鼓励，哪怕只是一封充满心意的sms，还是一封温馨的facebook inbox message，亦或许是温暖的来电，还是网络聊天，我明白的，很谢谢你们！！！如果言语上有任何冒犯我请求原谅，毕竟那时候的我，未免太悲观！（这是难免的，我也是人啊...）但我希望好朋友之间以后有什么事情大家尽量坦诚相对，有时候，逃避的那种感觉，会令人觉得我们很相近，但实际上我们会为了逃避某些课题而显得距离很远... 虽然我也明白啦，因为如果那是我，说不定我也会那么做的... 是不是？哈哈... 我没有责怪任何人的意思，只想说我们那天的坦诚相对，绝对会让我们的友情升华至另外一个境界！！！=D

总的来说，我想，我已经释怀了。对于得失之间已经没有抱着任何太大的希望，我会接受并且维持现状！最重要的保持乐观与开朗！！哈哈... 其实很高兴自己突然会有这种想法！也许现在最难过得就是得离开家乡适应新生活吧！但，这应该只是小case吧，我相信即将深造的学生们必定和我感同身受.. =)

18岁的黑色星期五，造就一道奇妙的旅程！

To myself.

2011-05-16T00:26:00.003+08:00

Waiting for the end to come
Wishing I had strength to stand
This is not what I had planned
It's out of my control....

Flying at the speed of light
Thoughts were spinning in my head
So many things were left unsaid
It's hard to let you go...

I know what it takes to move on,
I know how it feels to lie,
All I wanna do
Is trade this life for something new
Holding on to what I haven't got

Sitting in an empty room
Trying to forget the past
This was never meant to last,
I wish it wasn't so...

I know what it takes to move on,
I know how it feels to lie,
All I wanna do
Is trade this life for something new
Holding on to what I haven't got

What was left when that fire was gone?
I thought it felt right but that right was wrong
All caught up in the eye of the storm
And trying to figure out what it's like moving on
And i don't even know what kind of things I've said
My mouth kept moving and my mind went dead
So, picking up the pieces, now where to begin?
The hardest part of ending Is starting again!!

All I wanna do
Is trade this life for something new
Holding on to what i haven't got...

very disappointed. but what can i do???????????????? T.T

official announcement

2011-04-29T21:59:00.002+08:00

SH*T!

I HEREBY MAKE AN OFFICIAL ANNOUNCEMENT

I'M ON DIET!!!!!

lol! sh*t sh*t sh*t. everyone is claiming that i'm growing fatter day by day.
argh. can't stand that anymore because i feel the same thing as well.
ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!
more exercise!! no supper!! T_T
iamrealfatthistime!

mistreated misplaced misunderstood

2011-04-28T00:14:00.002+08:00

不要相信自己在灯光昏暗、夜幕低垂时分脑子里所闪出的直觉。
一般上这些直觉都是扰乱我们思路的垃圾，往往我们会在这时候贬低自己，把自己看的毫无价值般，然后就会陷入一片低落当中。

好像就是明天的这个时候就会坐在电脑面前狂等着JPA的成绩了。
哥哥问我准备好了吗？药剂系真的是你的选择吗？一年后出国的话怎样？你真的对生物有兴趣吗？得到了药剂系你真的会去吗？不会后悔？如果发现自己比较喜欢工程系怎么办？@.@

虽然说这些问题，我老早已将它们给消化一番了，不过这回被这么问道......

aiyahhhhhhh，我真的不知道lah。有时候真的就是follow the flow的态度而已。反正我一直都在秉持着那个“你读什么不代表你以后就做什么”的理念来选择科系。所以呢，一切听天由命！God has His plan for you! So be strong and move on!!! =D
okmybloggingmoodhasgoneallinasuddensoiwillstopherebye

成长喜悦？

2011-04-20T14:26:00.003+08:00

挥霍我一个月的十八岁了。哈哈。
原来成长之后再回首某些生活小事情是这种感觉来的！

在旧家的时候，那时年纪小，住在单层排屋，和邻居的关系其实相当友好，毕竟年纪小小是不会害羞，不会介意谁先和人家做朋友的。哈哈。而且那时候的年纪很流行玩pokemon，所以每天都会到附近的杂货店去买那个sticker，然后贴在收集的本子里，贴满后可以换取一架游戏机。（那种喂恐龙长大的游戏机！！）所以如果买到重复的sticker，就会吵邻居跟我交换。XD

哪像现在。住在邻居的一位女生和我同龄，而我们可是说是从八岁“一起成长”到十八岁，可是却从来没有说过一句话。
有时候觉得自己相当悲哀，记得那时候Form 4，因为SPM还没有换去12科的制度时候，学校总会流行一股理科班学生额外报考会计科，所以我也不例外。那时补习班结束的时候，下楼梯时候我居然还有那种“做末站在那边的uncle酱眼熟的？？爸爸还跟他聊天？？”。后来才发现他就是我邻居，然而她女儿也跟着我后面下着楼梯而已。天啊，我居然和我现在的邻居有着这样“奥妙”的关系。好丢脸哦。

哈哈，话说回小时候，因为房子不大，所以我们一家五口晚上都挤在一间小房睡觉。那个房间塞两张Queen Size的床褥还有一张Single Size的床褥已经满了。那时年纪小所以和妈妈睡在其中一个大床褥，然后哥哥和爸爸睡在其余的床褥。哈哈。因为我睡的位置靠窗口，所以每晚入睡前总会望向窗外看看街景（其实也没什么街景）一直到入睡为止。那种五个人窝在一起睡觉的感觉其实几幸福一下~ XD 还有那种很有规律的生活。晚上十二点以前入睡，然后早上八点起床喝milo后再去幼稚园。值得一提。

现在呢，除了睡觉时间常常不规律之外，当然也没有那么温馨挤在一起睡觉了，大家都需要大家的私人空间吧？所以分房睡了之后家里也不是酱大，我还是和哥哥挤在一间房间，但他也只是一个星期回来一次，所以大部分的时间也是自己一人享有整个房间。哈哈~

还有最可爱的是，小时候双亲节的时候什么都敢说出口，什么都敢做出来。哈哈。记得双双父母亲节时，我都会在前一天做张小卡片，把A4 paper对折两下然后用很多颜色的magic pen来记录自己的感恩。过后还会在对折的地方塞张RM10作为其节日的礼物！！！哈哈哈哈哈。想起来真的很好笑。不过小时候一张RM10真的已经很多了，也许是当时我们的天文数字了呢！现在呢？hehe... 到了节日那天我就会“大胆示爱”，而且还亲亲爸妈的脸颊。哈哈。我当时怎么会那么勇敢？！但他们好像都把卡片给丢了。XD 现在呢，凡父母亲节我们都会尽量到外面想用一顿大餐！可惜有时候父母自己不想要，所以也度过得很平凡。但是，只要家人团团圆圆，其实也已经远远超越那礼物还是什么庆典之类的了。

原来人长大了，很多我们习以为常的事情也会跟着改变，可惜我们不易察觉它。

p/s : 说真的，至今我还不知道其实我现任邻居家是姓什么的... lol!

what the hell?

2011-04-19T01:04:00.001+08:00

I wish I can play like them too! :D
i love the random shit on the background!!! hahahahahahaha. :D

爆灯

2011-04-16T17:18:00.005+08:00

因为我不是一个自信心爆灯的人，我也在学习着，请你不要一眼就判人家死刑，我不是啥认识你，你也不怎啥认识我，怎么可以用第一眼光来判断呢？我没有在责备你的意思，虽然从别人口中听后我心里确实是挺难受的，因为或许你所说的是对的，只是我一时无法接受？自尊心受挫不是说一两下子就能复原的。我很想证明它不是这样，可惜一次次的打击也开始让我觉得我自己其实是这样，我也无力挽回，而人的性格上本来就是有缺陷的，不可能完美，所以你爱怎么说就说吧，我活得开心就好？？我不知道，听到这种话从一个根本没啥交流的人的口中出来其实自己也挺吓到的，但也许你就是有这么一股神圣的才华吧。

又或许，我根本就是像你（另外一个你）所说的吧，忠言逆耳，所以我听不进。也许是这样。

我何尝不希望自己也是个自信心爆灯的人呢？？可惜我没本钱，更不能死厚脸皮用热脸贴人家的冷屁股，所以我也得慢慢学习再起步的啊。

经典老歌？=D

2011-04-16T17:08:00.005+08:00

此时此刻纯粹想听听这首歌。

D:

2011-04-14T01:36:00.003+08:00

想倾诉又找不到对的对象倾诉的感觉原来是酱的。
这是我第二次的经历。
所以？事情袭击时在最可能的情况下都忠于自己，冷静思考，自己解决，最好不过。

因为太阳明天还是会从东方升起！<3

这样才叫geng mah!!! xD

有时候我真的觉得自己很坏很坏很坏很坏

2011-04-09T01:46:00.005+08:00

就这样。很对不起。:(
我会复原的。

又把自己的微妙机会杀死了

Cheng Beng

2011-04-04T12:51:00.002+08:00

I slept for 10 hours today! From 2am till 12pm. What a life.
I don't know why but, just have a feeling can't wait to study.
Well, was almost got myself into the March Intake A Levels but in the end I didn't.
Decided to wait since it is not worthwhile to gamble with RM9k.
So for the meantime I'll still wait patiently if there is any other offer. =/
But seriously, I'm kinda worried if I've opted the wrong choice. D:
Gahhhh.

Second day of work! 530pm!
For now, lunch!! =)

我们都应该学会

2011-04-02T01:32:00.005+08:00

难怪林俊杰会唱道：
“我们都是泡沫轻轻一碰就破”

其实人生就只有这么一次。这一秒不知道下一秒即将发生什么事。
也许最近经历过，阅历也不少，因此好像更懂得什么叫短暂。
脑子里的警钟一直告诉自己，该学会怎么去珍惜。

其实人生就只有这么一次。趁着四肢健全，为什么要踌躇、为什么要犹豫呢？
如果自己想要做什么，放胆去吧！开朗地赌一场吧！不抱任何奢望去玩一场吧！
成功了，就享受苦尽甘来喜滋滋的感受。
失败了，就学会怎么从跌倒后卷土重来。
乐观的面对每一种可能性。

其实人生就只有这么一次。看着那些正在为下一秒的生命而拼搏的病人，我们算得上什么呢？
再看看残障人士怎么克服自己的障碍并取得成功，我们也能的是不？
为了小事唉声叹气？愁眉苦脸了一整天。
面对问题事得闹得全世界来为你分担？累人累己。
Haih~~ 有时候，真的只能说人类很矛盾…

其实人生就只有这么一次。做你想做的事吧。
奋斗虽然是奋斗，但是切记，成果并不是一切…
重点在于，你自己的人生度过得如何，并不是一切努力都一定要换来甜美的结果。
所以大家，再忙也好，记得停下脚步，反省一下自己的人生定义，也许你会比较乐观一点。
毕竟，大家都只想追求一个对自己来说是A+的人生，所以为了别人而勇敢，但随着自己的方式而活！
届时，我们就可以交出一张漂亮的人生成绩单…

珍惜当下
乐观面对
笑口常开

=)

less than 3

2011-04-02T00:27:00.002+08:00

their voices are so angelic. they heal the broken hearts indeed. <3

maybe this is wishful thinking, probably mindless dreaming

2011-04-01T22:34:00.009+08:00

are there really readers??? i can't believe seeing few of you leaving comments in chatbox. (despite those spams lah) there are still readers!! and maybe some stalkers who don't leave comments! that is the motive i continue blogging! :)

april fool today. so boring la. last time still can fool people in school. now no more. it's like you want people to fool you they also malas nak layan you d. LOL. and i almost got fooled by some facebook people by wishing them happy birthday. ah. lol. luckily i did not. removed my post immediately after the wish. stupid. XD

oh ya. i got my job yesterday. KUMON markers. with eng seng. ;) surprisingly i met my nenek joyce sham there! *blonde* haha. other than marking those papers we are supposed to guide the students with their homework. D: and luckily the teacher told us that NONE of them are in the super high level, so basically we have to deal with form 4 form 5 add maths la. but i forgot most of them already, hard to recall. there was an indian girl asking me about log, and she's about form 1 or form 2 only. i don't know whether she could understand me. i kept asking her, you understand ma? she just nodded her head and i continue blahhhh with my explanation. hope she got it btw. it enlightens me on how difficult can teaching is. fuh. you have the knowledge but that doesn't mean you are capable in passing the knowledge to others. haha. what a skill. i have to master it. i only work for twice a week. 4 hours a day. RM 6 per hour and i was like "wao!!" i thought it would be rm 4 only. hahaha. hope to enjoy it in the next class! ;) already got rm24! ka ching!! $$

looking back at old photos again. haha. >< and part of the lyrics appeared in my mind. :/
后来终于在眼泪中明白
有些人一旦错过就不在

而我竟然还活在过去...

2011-03-29T01:35:00.004+08:00

hello readers!! i wonder how many readers left in my blog. haha. nevermind. i will still update when my mood is into the blog.

SPM results announced on the 23rd of March. I kept my fingers crossed all the time until I got my results. I'm glad and I'm super satisfied with it!! :) At the same time, feel bad for some of my friends whom I thought they could do well. But when I asked them about it, they were so disappointed. Feels like giving myself a big slap for asking silly question that time. >< after that, we went to KP for lunch and some games, then Aeon for movie. :) The World Invasion Battle of LA. zzz. my second time of watching this movie. I was the only one who already watched the movie so I am kinda.. yeah kinda kiam pa in the cinema. 0.fb all the time until 6pm. XD
so honestly, i m glad meeting up with my friends that I didn't meet for quite a time dy! But some of them went back straight after got back their results, so it is still not a perfect timing for outing yet. X.x awww.

then, on the 26th, the Earth Hour day. ray, jiawei, twins, olivia, tracy, weeminn, bing and i went to the orphanage house situated nearby the Teluk Gadung station. i went late and so sorry for being late X.x i thought i wont be able get into their circles as i went late, and as a result i might not coping up what is their topic and etc. but in fact not! LOL. as i went in to the orphanage home, Mani (the Joyce-wannabe) introduced himself to me and i felt so bad for not introducing myself to him at first. lol. and in a meantime we already can get into their group. :) they are somehow adorable. and especially when you look at those teenagers, yeah, they are super matured. they do chores and their behaviour is just so matured. i believe they will succeed in the future if they are given the opportunity... well. this was a great experience for me. at least i realized something that i have to value and treasure it in my daily life. :/ it was about 3pm, the orphans suggested to go for a football game. and Joseph being the football fans cannot go for that sport, from the founder, he said he is having some heart problem and he will get tired easily. So the rest of us went to the field and he helped us to lock the door. he was crying while locking. heartache. ='( </3 luckily there was tracy who's able to cool him down and console him.. i felt bad for him. :( so it was a nice experience, do go to the orphanage house if you have the opportunity. :) i thought it was boring as we have to force ourselves to mix into their group, it sounded kinda wrong but in fact, their frequencies themselves are much higher than us. they have no problem in joining our group. once again, felt so bad for myself to think about those unnecessary thoughts. :( they are actually very adorable!! and for the teenagers there, damn matured that you would rise a sense of respect in yourself to them! probably they would even thinking us so childish to play those games with the kids? haha ;)

at night, went for a mini Earth Hour party at Zy's house. nothing much here. but i really wanted to thank the two of you so much!!! can't believe there are friends like this when i'm really in need. :P =) ray and yinyean! =D

so at around 10 something, ajak rongkai to mamak, with Zy. discussed about my study worries. i was really so indecisive. hate myself. -.- my decision, shook from here to there, shook from there and came back again. it was just so hard to make a firm decision. but in the end, i chose to wait for any scholarship offers instead of gambling my 9k to March intake first. i wished i am right but even if otherwise, i still can go for Form 6 / July intake whereby in the July intake, the full tuition fee waivers is still there. :) so thanks to lots of people who were willing to listen to me. yes, thanks to you too wency! =D

so i am still applying scholarship thingy. almost done i supposed. and after that. job hunting!! ;)

2011-03-17T02:08:00.002+08:00

我在facebook无意间点进去5S1 Class Trip 2010的照片。
一切还是那么的犹新！！可是我却不敢相信那已经过了三个月！！
天啊，连我这种在家发霉的都觉得时间过得那么快！
所以你可以发现到时间老人的效率，几年了却没改变过！！
可是，换个角度想，有时候真的觉得自己很自愧不如！
NS 的，三个月的体验也已经有所收获，回来了。
读书的，一切应该也可以跟上脚步，脑袋应该不会生锈了吧。
打工的，现在已经有了三个月薪水了吧。

而我呢？

为了安慰自己，为了为自己而找个借口，我只好告诉自己说：
"算了吧！！这种三个月轻轻松松毫无压力自由自在的日子，以后还会再来吗？？"

lol...
hehe，但看完那些照片，再想想我们下个星期三就会见面了真的觉得很开心。
朋友们，下个星期三大家拿了成绩一起吃个饭吧！！！
虽然我知道现在的我总会活在过去，我知道我会很想念你们，
但我真的没有想过自己会那么那么那么的想念你们！！！！

true! :D

2011-03-14T12:34:00.000+08:00

dang!

2011-03-09T10:37:00.002+08:00

www.bumigemilang.com
and now you're kidding, telling me the results DIJANGKA akan diumumkan pada 16 Mac 2011?

LOL...

2011-03-05T20:22:00.005+08:00

My brain is rotting. I forgot all my favourite Chemistry stuff and not to mention other subjects thingy. Mushroom has grown and shed for IDK how many times on my head and all over my body parts. ;(

Somehow I enjoy being a mushroom MOST of the time. Let's think about it. Do you have the chance next time when you enter uni? teehee

Spent my time to do the same research on future study stuff. I've got an idea about what to study finally and bingo! ;D No, I still have to wait for my SPM results! Weird dream starts to set in every night. I can't stop liking the excitement but yeah, I don't like waiting. Do something please dear government. -.-

Issue on tertiary education lasts for another week. ;( A Level or Form 6. wthiwant?

And whoah !

2011. Year of Ipad 2

so? -.-

a typical S shape in a S-shaped spine

2011-03-02T12:49:00.001+08:00

it was a 25 degree curve back in September.
now it is still a 25 degree, sigh in relief!!

BUT

there is a new curve of 30 degree up there.
the doctor didn't realize it on the previous check up.
wth?
hope it doesn't get worse.
next check up during the year end. D:
good luck to me!!! :D

yannaDEY

2011-02-26T00:40:00.001+08:00

deyy
am i thinking too much or what
am i rich enough to go for a levels?
deyyy!!!
what about degree course in future? another kind of expenses.
DEYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!
how come this question come question me right now.
O.M.G!!!

2011-02-25T22:43:00.001+08:00

the world and reality are like that.
you always have to stand on the people's side, hear them, listen to them, understand their feelings.
but, your own feelings?

2011-02-25T20:34:00.002+08:00

i'm feeling a little bit down today.
it's just like i don't have the guts to do things that i would like to try out.
it's just like i don't have the motive to move forward.
it's just like i have been worrying things too much.
it's just like having a mental tiredness.
it's so hard to disguise yourself sometimes.
urgh.

IDK.

a nice song to share

2011-02-25T02:01:00.003+08:00

I'm so glad you made time to see me
How's life, tell me how's your family
I haven't seen them in a while
You've been good, busier than ever
We small talk, work and the weather
Your guard is up and I know why
Because the last time you saw me
Is still burned in the back of your mind
You gave me roses and I left them there to die
So this is me swallowing my pride,
Standing in front of you saying I'm sorry for that night
And I'd go back to December all the time
It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you
Wishing that I'd realized what I had when you were mine
I'd go back to December, turn around and make it alright
I go back to December all the time
These days I haven't been sleeping
Staying up playing back myself leaving
When your birthday passed and I didn't call
And I think about summer, all the beautiful times
I watched you laughing from the passenger side and
Realized I loved you in the fall
And then the cold came,
The dark days when fear crept into my mind
You gave me all your love and all I gave you was goodbye
So this is me swallowing my pride,
Standing in front of you saying I'm sorry for that night
And I'd go back to December all the time
It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you
Wishing that I'd realized what I had when you were mine
I'd go back to December, turn around and change my own mind
I go back to December all the time
I miss your fair skin, your sweet smile, so good to me, so right
And how you held me in your arms that September night,
The first time you ever saw me cry
Maybe this is wishful thinking
Probably mindless dreaming
If we loved again I swear I'd love you right
I'd go back in time and change it but I can't
So if the chain is on your door, I understand
But this is me swallowing my pride,
Standing in front of you saying I'm sorry for that night
And I'd go back to December
It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you
Wishing that I'd realized what I had when you were mine and
I go back to December, turn around and make it alright and
I go back to December, turn around and change my own mind and
I go back to December all the time

《你们，我们，他们》

2011-02-24T00:55:00.001+08:00

他们一开始是一大群死党,
后来渐渐变成三人行,
最后两人坠入情网,
另一人伤心离去.

恋爱中的人们,
通常不会再与死党联络,
因此,甚至在他们分手多年后,
他们的朋友还是弄不懂,
当年到底发生了什么事。

爱情总是无言地迫害着友情。

淫艳够，谢谢你。 :D

January is about to end

2011-01-19T12:02:00.004+08:00

So, it is soon that January 2011 will become the past of our lives.

Those who taking CPU in Taylor's started their orientation on Monday.
Those who taking A-levels in Taylor's started their orientation on Tuesday.
Those who taking SAM in Taylor's started their orientation today.
Tomorrow is Thaipussam.
When is my turn? :(

I really hope I will not regret of not taking anyone of the Pre-U programmes!! D=
While me, I'm thinking of taking foundation in engineering.. in Nott? Just like my brother, will be commencing on 25th of April. O_O still very very long time to go. So I am seeking for a part time job!!!
andineverthoughtthat___rightnow.:(

2011

2011-01-08T17:39:00.002+08:00

What a year! This is Day 8 of the brand new 2011. I don't even realize that it is already 2011. Haha.

2010, sad to say it wasn't a blast! I had to deal with so much kind of stress that year. Seriously the feeling was so bad. But anyway, I've learnt a lot from it! Life has too much more to go through and I shouldn't be feeling sad just for those smalley matters. Haha. Day 1 of 2011? Very great! I did not sleep at all, slacked and stalked in KJ house with SC and YY. That was a fun night and a great morning!! Haha. We slacked, in the living room, chatted about anything until 6am something, yeah, it was 6!! Then we went to use the Internet to stalk people!! LOL. We did not realize it was already 7.30am and that morning sunshine was awesomely nice!! So being the early birds we went for a morning walk! Nice Botanic view!! xD In the end, 3 of us beh tahan and slept at 10am. -.- Upside down world!!

LOL. I'm still the same. Malas to upload pictures. =X you can stalk my profile in Facebook about how nice was the Botanic view. Haha. And went out with friends to Botanic Club on Day 5! Had sports, jaguzzi bath and made fun in Jessie's house until late at night. That was a memorable night because all of us were having the same frequency!!! Hahahaha. So every topic we had was so... *tink tink!!*

Day 7. Kacau-ed people in MSN!!! Bwahahaha.

Day 8. Feeling frustrated for my future path. A level? Foundation programme? omg. I am really frust. It seems like I can't make decision on my own. Whatever decision I feel to make, it would be strongly disagree by family. I don't know. Just feeling like giving up and let them make all those decision, while I just enjoy my holidays life will do. Isn't that much easier?? Kind of fed up sometimes. ><><

Day 9? Time to go out again. ><

And about 2010. I promised that I would update about it but I delayed. XD I don't know. Somehow not feeling to mention about it right now. Haha. It's ok, when the mood comes I think I will write down everything about it. Kind of lazy right now. Especially when it comes to blogging. Too many things to bother right now that I don't even feel like finding a part time job, while my friends do. =/ Well, maybe I really enjoy slacking at a right timing. It's ok!! xD

Should I upload pictures for this post? :/

偶然的发现

2010-12-16T01:33:00.001+08:00

其实，gossip 人家真的很不好。
近来真的很讨厌 gossip。也许！

Baby

2010-12-12T21:13:00.000+08:00

Sooo shimple but sweet. XD

中国文学

2010-12-09T14:11:00.001+08:00

感觉上考的时候还好…
考出来才发现该写的答案没写到！
惨！！=(
会失去几分呢？？
会影响到grade吗？

=(

明年三月... T_T

柠檬草的味道

2010-12-05T18:12:00.003+08:00

不是你的，怎么等，等了几年，也不会是你的吧！
也许是你迟疑，也许是你缺乏经验，也或许是你不了解状况...
钻牛角尖不是办法，可能，放下是最好的选择。

祝福...

Gratitude

2010-12-03T17:19:00.001+08:00

I realized, life has got so much more other things to be treasured.

Be thankful!!!

Week 1

2010-11-26T15:14:00.001+08:00

is over!
May the 3 upcoming weeks past faster too. and bring us to 14th December 2010 1:00pm as soon as possible!
I just can't wait that moment to come. :)

So far so good I guess, like everyone said, Sejarah was totally out of expectation!
lol... What done is done... I just regret for not writing a nice handwriting like I always did.. Ahaha. But it's because I'm out of time!! So hopefully the pemeriksa's still able to read my handwriting.. :)

Be happy!! ^^

助人为快乐之本

2010-11-19T20:25:00.000+08:00

原来帮助人家，自己也会感到满足、快乐。^^

!!

2010-11-17T00:17:00.002+08:00

唉… 笨到不行！
恨自己。

祝你一路顺风

2010-11-15T12:18:00.000+08:00

我只好深深地祝福你...... :)

掉了

2010-11-09T18:01:00.002+08:00

怎么会这样...
答案呼之欲出。

不用紧，太阳依然从东方升起!!!

直觉

2010-11-07T20:44:00.000+08:00

这一次，应该不会错了吧…=|

SPM

2010-11-06T18:54:00.000+08:00

届时，希望自己有那颗平常心来面对，且享受整个过程！

独行侠

2010-11-06T17:10:00.000+08:00

这街上太拥挤，太多人有秘密…

面对吧，做个快乐的人！！！=D

My Koku Sijil!

2010-11-05T14:40:00.001+08:00

I suddenly realised that in my Koku sijil, there is no column for the AJK Biasa Rumah A. T_T I know I did not help a lot, but I tried my best helping you all le!!! Now where's my name?! T_T

Hope it is not too late for me to see Pn. Thulasi on Monday. XD

Graduation day!!!!!!

Come back

2010-10-31T20:17:00.001+08:00

那个平时做事认真，有点小潇洒，积极乐观，勇于突破的我在哪里了？？
你好像一去不回头了…
快回来好吗？

走出阴影原来需要一段时间。
虽然那不是什么大问题，可是却在我心中产生极大的影响！
我好糟糕啊，居然从一个勇于面对挑战的人变成畏惧于困难的人。
从一个原本没啥自信心的人，变得更加没有自信了。
我知道问题出在哪，所以我还在给我自己时间，慢慢克服自己。
所幸地说，我的情况有待改善。 ^^
因为，每天一幅苦瓜脸不是我从前的原则。
因为，成天趴在一旁胡思乱想更不是我的人生目标。
啊，对了，自己因为过不了自己那关，开始变得杞人忧天。
杞人忧天的感觉，真的很恐怖。
它，让你变得爱抱怨，让你变得不幸福！！！
也许，那不叫不幸福，而是让你身在福中不知福！！
这股多么可怕的力量，难道要让你在面对一个风波之后，才懂得醒悟吗？
嗯，所以如果平时没事的你，不要胡思乱想，不要随意放空。
放空，也要放在美好的事物之上，人自然也会比较开朗快乐！！

原来出外尽情玩乐真的有帮助！！
很谢谢昨天的那个sudden plan，让我沉闷的周末里有了别一番滋味。
那晚，虽然短暂，但我却在那瞬间获得了释放整颗心的感觉！！
好久都没有这种感觉了，难怪我会那么向往trip！！

回想起来，我还蛮敬佩当初把一切都藏在心底的我。
在毫无旁人，朋友，或者家人的情况下，一切东西要我自己打理，然后还要面对压力，虽然那时感到很痛苦，可是，我是怎么撑过来的啊？
所以，现在一切过去了，我确定，如果心底还有任何杂念，那绝对就是杞人忧天。
身为年轻人，即将面临18岁，新的人生，新的挑战，奋斗吧，前进吧，不要回头看了。
这9和10月，我发现我居然有好一段岁月是在杞人忧天，钻牛角尖中度过的。
不是我没事做，而是人陷入多愁善感的坑洞，往往无法自拔…

所以，一直以来，我都很羡慕身旁的朋友怎么可以那么开朗，怎么可以那么乐观。
但，又仔细想想，其实自己之前在毫无顾虑的情况下也不是过得很快乐吗？？
怎么因为一时的困难，我把我自己封锁起来了呢？
我也不是从困难中走出来了吗？现在和以前，除了心态不一样，一切都安然无恙，不是吗？
醒悟吧…

留心观察的朋友，我的改变也许让你们吓到了，还记得那段最痛苦的日子，整天无精打采，脸色真的愁云惨雾，虽然说不出心底完全的心声，可是朋友们，不要担心，我只是处于一个前所未有的低潮，而那份低潮的根源竟是“杞人忧天”。
好笑吧！！

历经那么多这种感觉，我开始明白，每个人其实都想保持乐观，人感到伤心，难过而摆着一幅脸，确实是难免的，因为他们也想要冲破自己那关，让自己开心起来…

也许就是这种杞人忧天的感觉，让我开始觉得人生好无趣啊！
就是这份杞人忧天，扰乱了整个人的心绪。
都说是杞人忧天，现在的我，安然无恙，身体健康，照理来说是应该积极生活！！！怎么可以有这种想法呢？
而实际上，人生无趣？？其实我只是把眼前所有的事情丢在一旁，现在，要一一把它们完成！！

很谢谢一直陪在身旁的朋友，你们太乐观了，能和你们在一起真好！！能够让我羡慕你们的滋味也很好！！
因为你们让我知道，其实我跟你们一样，都很幸福！！！

还有23天SPM。哈哈。老实说我还没有开始温习功课。但这个星期一内铁定开始了。我想最迟是剩下21天的时候吧，就是3个星期前的时候。这2个月，虽然人有点太钻牛角尖，可是让我了解了不少东西，我会尽快让自己开心起来！！！不会再摆那幅脸了。
也很希望接下来的SPM，一切不会再重来，如果它真的重来，至少我已经走过，知道要怎么解决了！！

共勉之！

10 月就这样过了！！！
哇~~~

谢谢你们

2010-10-28T22:02:00.000+08:00

在我最无助最彷徨的时刻，轻轻地拍打我的肩膀。

happiness

2010-10-18T22:20:00.002+08:00

i have nothing to worry about.
why am i feeling unhappy.
i just want to be happy...
and being optimistic like how i always did before everything...
grrrgh.

Epic fail

2010-10-05T15:05:00.002+08:00

Epic phail. Eric fail!
Ahahaha trial is ending so I'm very happy. very very happy.
=D I don't know what am I doing, trial started on the 21st, and I went online since that day frequently. ><
I was stressed, but what I did was like very relaxing, irony tho.

* 50 things to do after SPM? =O

获益

2010-10-02T01:13:00.000+08:00

我说，人的思想是不是太过狭隘呢？

常常只会把自己的问题放大，然后责怪为何上帝那么不公平，心有余悸般地，成天闷闷不乐，即使周遭所有的一切美好事物也在眼前顿时化作灰烬，从不去珍惜。

其实，只要稍微将头脑转一点点，学会放下，学会看开一点，世界就变得那么简单…

你会发现，其实身边一直还有很多支持你的人。
你会发现，其实事情并没有你想象中的那么严重。
你会发现，其实生活如果没有了这些考验就不再有乐趣。
你会发现，其实生活但中还有活得比你更加痛苦的人。
你会发现，其实阳光总在风雨后。

切记，你只是爱把问题放大，并不是世界上最凄惨的人。

Last!

2010-10-01T15:39:00.001+08:00

So it's October 2010!
Exam will end on the 7th! Nice man!

Last month of secondary school life, not nice at all!!!
I want more! =(

Optimistic!!

2010-09-12T22:27:00.000+08:00

Yes, must behave like a winner does no matter what happen next!!
Being optimistic is great! :)

Let's partay! xD

:'(

2010-09-12T17:27:00.001+08:00

not in the mood to study.
so darn stressed up this time. ):
idk why?

September

2010-09-10T15:50:00.002+08:00

Books books and books...
13th Sept is coming.
Meaning? MRI day. -.-
How would it be? ><
omg God bless.. tolong tolong popeeeeeeee!

wasn't a good Friday

2010-09-04T00:53:00.000+08:00

I drove 3 times today. Met obstacles during the 3 times.
Got sneer remarks and middle finger from an Indian as well.
What happened? ):

回音

2010-09-02T18:15:00.000+08:00

当你问道一个疑问，问了很多次，全世界都不给你任何反应，你会怎样收拾残局？

还是少讲话，多做事为妙。

=(

Famined

2010-08-24T19:34:00.003+08:00

Famine 30. My brand new experience with friends. (:
This time, I went to SJK(C) Perempuan with some of my friends.
It wasn't so nice as what I was expecting, maybe this is the way it went.
Cause it's a Famine 30 camp and not others where you can eat, and bath, and sleep in a nice place.
lol. You have to live as if you are a human from poverty, but thank God we still could have Soya Bean as our lunch and dinner, and water any time you want.

I was arranged into the 20th group.
I thought it was gonna be sooooo boring initially, lol, this was simply because other than Chee Seng and 3 of the Kwang Hua girls, the rest of about 13 people are like... >20 years old, they are more matured and I believe we would have a big gap when it comes to play and talk.
Feeling awkward, my thought was wrong! [yay!!!]
Instead, I feel that my group is the best among the all. Haha.
Even though they are sort of... Erm.. Matured, yeah, they still could play like teenagers do!! Whoah!
We had 饥饿挑战, it was something like Station Game and all you need to do is run and jump and etc etc to burn your fats up and use your energy. lol.
There was a game, where you need to merompak, Chee Seng and I thought we already collected much for the group, but who knows, the girls collected much more than us!! Amazed!! XD

What is funny about my group is, we didn't have a group name at first, because all of us were not interacting at the very first of the event started. Then, the leader chin chin chai chai suggested Rome, but I suggested California instead. Sooooo, when it comes to our turn to shout our group name, we shouted California!
And here goes our slogan, simple but impressive. (:
"WELCOME TO, CA-LI-FOR-NIA~!"
XD

On the second day, I sprained my back. -.-
Very great. I thought of leaving earlier, and after taking an hour to decide, I made up my mind to stay, my perseverance. XD
And I was quite suffering until the end of the day. -.-
Sat on the bus, I couldn't move, just could maintain my seating position all the way until we reached Bukit Jalil.
And wth, the weather was rather hot, the sun was burning like... Argh.
I was like an old man walking very slowly until we settled down on the seat!!
Sat high up in the Bukit Jalil stadium stage, then I just remained my seating position until 4pm, got no mood to scream, not in the right tune to stand and wave my hands according to the rhythm.
Argh, back home, after dinner, went to see tabib cina and i slept quite early that day.

What an experience. /.\
But the Famine 30 makes me appreciate what I have in present!! =O

Zero.

2010-07-31T01:28:00.003+08:00

People.
I have a huge thought in the middle of the night.
This will be a great Saturday!
lol not this not this.
It is, don't ever take things for granted.
We live to appreciate the presence, treat everyone and everything with sincerity, do not expect that things come to you just to be simple and nice.
When I was young, I used to take everything just like they should belong to me, or should treat me right all the time.
That was so wrong.
I understand how it feels when time passes by.
You came to the world with nothing, definitely, you will leave here without bringing along a thing too.
So, so, take in a deep breathe, and let out a long sigh?
Feeling refreshed?
Remember!! Treasure the things you have now, they won't last forever, and similarly they won't be right to you all the times.

Cherish!! =D

To be exact, this two weeks of mine are not really a good one.
But... There will be always another tomorrow.
Thanks to friends who always by the side of me during this period.. =)

With love,
good night people.. Have a great weekend!

Annoying Orange =O

2010-07-22T20:28:00.000+08:00

I'm so not in mood to do anything.
This happens on every July of the year which I don't know why.
Damn.
And there are so much conflicts happened since last Saturday.
So much. I meant it. Not only one. Since last Sat! I hope we did not have any celebration on that day. Haha.
Another damn.
The Fokus making me not in the mood to study.
I went for Bio test without a full understand about the subtopic, even just 5 pages only.
I went for Maths test without preparing myself on the latest topic, which I thought I supposed to know how to answer as I just learned them only.
I sat for BM and BI test by just speed reading the novels.
I sat for Sejarah test by just referring to the tips at all, and not preparing any objective questions.
What's next? =( I have to do well in Chemistry and Add Maths!
Third damn.

Conclusion? July faster over la. AGM faster come la. Get nerd earlier la. Holiday faster come la. Playing moments faster come la.

Classmates are talking about the annoying orange in youtube for like months already since school reopens.
Quite interesting, yet quite annoying too. xD

Wasn't promosing

2010-06-29T19:18:00.002+08:00

Tickets? I thought we have sold about 400, but in fact, just 250+.
To achieve our aim? Not now, there are still three days time.
Keep our fingers crossed!!

I can't stop imagining how grand will the event be.
But then, there must be lots of audience there, only we can proceed it successfully!!
Hope to see you guys there!
And we'll provide the best for you! XD

My juniors, I hope you guys can regain your spirit in PBC after the event, specially to Form 2 and Form 3. I know you all are lacking experience, so you all like don't dare to hold a responsibility about it or even care about it, but, sooner or later, you guys will grow up and become the leader soon. I hope you people can gain something, even though you all aren't involve that much...

For Form 4, I hope you all can regain your TRUE spirit in PBC in this event... You all shall not forget why you join us. Just be rational, don't forget the "why".

Best of luck!!

And Svenja, its the last day for you tomorrow!
OMG... T_T

I passed!

2010-06-28T23:47:00.001+08:00

That's so true!
Second attempt for Bukit. I thought I'm gonna *failed this so badly*.
Luckily I managed to climb up on the yellow line still. >_<
Sooooo. I'll play my role to be a responsible driver in the future de...!

I had a lovely night with my classmates yesterday.
We had dinner at Lucky Ten.
It was Svenja's farewell party.
She didn't cry. -.-
But she said she was speechless.
S-t-u, pid!
Haha.

I hate you!!!

2010-06-23T18:50:00.002+08:00

Yes, I rarely hate somebody. -.-
But I seriously hate you, you and you!
Please don't ever mess with me!
I already told you that I've my own fully booked schedule this week and there must be a no change for my lesson!
Why you "OK OK" then end up keep changing?
Until today you told me 3pm, but you called me at 4pm telling me that your car broke cannot fetch me pula?
WTF! I tried not to take my nap just to wait for you, at least 1 1/2 hour!
Then you wasted my time, with those "Sorry ah next time wont liao" words.
This isn't the 1st time or 2nd time.
This will be my 5th lesson, but then, you never come punctually except for one time, just that one time only!
So now, you changed my time to Friday and Saturday.
And I warned you, better that you come punctual for both days!!!
-_-
After next Monday, I don't feel like seeing you all anymore! WTH! [I hope so!!]
Furiously, I went to sleep. -_-
But now I still couldn't let out my feeling!!!

p/s : People who haven't got their L license or undang test. Don't come to my center(?), other places should be better, I supposed. -_-
fcukyou!

21st June

2010-06-21T00:01:00.003+08:00

A new semester. A new me!
Does this sounds familiar to you?
Haha.

We often set ourselves a new aim or a new goal when a new semester comes.
It will be something goes like :
1. Yes!! After school reopens I swear I'll online 3 hours only per week (or maybe lesser) XD
2. If can I would like to online only on weekends!!
3. STUDY CONSISTENTLY! Preferably 2 hours per day. =X
4. No more procrastination! What's given today must be done today!
5. No more sleeping in class!
6. Concentrate full time in class!
7. No more naps at home!
etc etc...

I always did that until recently.
Because I failed everytime, just like you, right? Haha.

200th

2010-06-17T17:47:00.002+08:00

Congrats!
It's proven. one year 100 posts! Haha.

The holiday is super duper short!
3 days back to schooling days.
Yes. I have 3 wars to go!
1st, the examination papers will be giving out during the school reopen week. What is done is done, it's just the matter of how you gonna face your results. XD

2nd, 28th June. Driving test!!!! That will be my first day of ponteng school I supposed... Sh*t la, can I don't ponteng? lol.

3rd, 2nd July! The final war and a must-not-fail war!!!
Finally we have an idea for the opening ceremony. XD
Its validity is not proven and I hope it works when we try it on Saturday!

4th driving lesson tomorrow. Followed by BM tuit.
Attending some function in HICT, then meeting at Hokkien Association and followed by some photoshop stuff at home on Saturday.
Then Sunday.
And that's mark the end of the mid term holidays.

2nd term of Form 5. I'm coming! XD

Mr Wong

2010-06-13T01:58:00.000+08:00

is so lol.

I was tired, and about to sleep after blogging.
And out of the blue, facebook chat works.
"hi y so late, young man"
It's from Mr Wong!
LOL.

Driving

2010-06-13T01:22:00.002+08:00

is good!

I had my 3rd lesson yesterday afternoon.
The secretary told me to get ready at 2pm. But the driver came at 12pm instead.
Just like the 2nd time, It was supposed to be 10am but the driver came only at 11am.
I don't know what's wrong with their system and time arrangement.
I hope I can settle everything including the driving test before 21st of July so that I need not to renew my L license. =)
So far so good, I fear of roundabouts. Haha.
By the way, the driving centre is a heaven of free sauna, just like what bee kee told before. -.-

I had my own sweet time during last Sat and Sun. Spending all my time at home, cleaning the room, went online to cope things that I left out during the exam weeks. Feeling great. =D

Tuesday was a crazy day. The awesome six, which consist of 3 boys and 3 girls went to do some soh*i things. lol. Initially just planned to go Sunway Pyramid and after that Bukit Cahaya for some exercise, then upon reaching S.Pyramid, we suddenly changed our thought to go Sunway Lagoon. But we did not bring any extra clothes, so we bought them as cheap as possible. -.-
The boys bought the same shorts and even underwear. o.o
Girls bought the same bra, same towels, same undies. O_O
So boys spent about RM14 on the clothes, while Girls spent about RM44! O_O
They bought shampoo and slander in addition. -.-
End up, it was raining outside and then we thought the entry ticket was RM48. Mana tau it was RM70 including deposit!
Not enough money, we went RedBox.
Was supposed to stay until 3pm, but thinking that was kind of wastage if we don't make use on what we've bought. So at 2pm, we went Wet World. -_- (Of course there're a lot more of circumstances on our way to the destination)
The entry ticket was only RM10. Haha. But the toilet was......
Lol. Anyway, we had lots of fun even though it was totally not thrilling as Sunway Lagoon.
Back home, we realised we spent a lot of money. /.\
It took us stupid few hours to wait for the stupid buses.
Furious, we went back by taxi. And I went tuition at night! Tired but contented. =D
* Photos @ Shu Ping's camera...

Wednesday, I had tuition in the morning, driving in the afternoon and gathering in the evening. 16 of the 5S1 people went Aeon for movie - Killer. The original plan was, after movie, either we went Greenbox or outside Aeon for steamboat dinner. But idk why, end up the girls all balik rumah. -.-
Left 9 boys loitering around. We were hesitating on steamboat or eat in Aeon.
It was raining, -_- so, Black Canyon.
9 sets of Today's special, American Fried Rice + Orange juice. Haha. XD
After WaiHoong and ThuanSong went back, the 7 of us went to my house. XD
My room and my bed is a very good place for talking, and conducive for sleeping. I know.
Bila nak come stay? Haha. =D
* Two miserable photos @ Guan Yee and Wai Hoong's HP. -.-

Thursday, meeting about wywh.
So far so good, the selling of the tickets weren't promising.
Some went KP after the meeting to sell, managed to sell 14 tickets and found a sponsor.
=(
Who's gonna buy our tickets?
2nd of July... It's so near!!!!
Stage. Idk it's good or not.
It doesn't seem good for us to make it complicated.
We prefer it to be simple and nice.
Stress from the ex seniors are really inevitable, but we have to cope, I hope we will not be receiving much sneer remarks on that day... We are trying to make it perfect. T_T
Still working very hard on the opening ceremony and decorations.
I hope all of us can be resourceful and think of something good.
Pls pls my dear group members, you all are grown up now. XD Have to contribute something so that you all will not go helpless in the future...
19 days. *wtf*

Kk.. I'm done with reporting again. Lol.
Freaking worried with the upcoming event...
19 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2710

2010-06-06T00:19:00.002+08:00

is near. 26 days from now.

Currently speechless, stress is gushing up.
It's not even a month time for us to prepare...
Support is needed.
Everyone please be ready... The last war for us, and the last war for juniors in year 2009/2010...

Rest

2010-06-04T14:47:00.001+08:00

is very important.

Since mid of April until now, I did not have a quality rest.

So now, sleep!

Reminiscing

2010-05-28T20:54:00.003+08:00

Till then, life's good.
Science students end their exam on Thursday, but mine Friday, because of Kesusasteraan Cina. What a burden. Grr.
I have two relaxing days, stress off!!! Hopefully tomorrow can focus on studying for the following subjects. =D

Reminiscing.
I thought of how funny was I when the age of 7 or 8.
I have many cousin brothers, but there are two, whom I once was very close with them, and now we went part ways like we don't know each other.
I used to go their house to play that time, with my bro.
Sometimes we could even stay there, lol.
I remembered my Aunt served some creamy and tasty prawn for us as dinner if we went there. Sedappp.
Then, there's one time my grades fell terribly, and I somemore insisted to ponteng tuition classes, just to go my cousin's site for fun. LOL.
My mum stopped me and alas, I went tuition with a sorrow face.
But then after that I still went there for fun... XD
Couldn't believe it until I've seen back my report cards just now.
Ahahaha.
After some months, or years, I'm not sure.
LOL. Was very childish, I quarreled with one of the cousin.
One day he called and wanted to talk to my bro, I picked up the call and talked to him in a very no manner way. XD
Hahaha. Nostalgia.
But now, due to some, erm some 'problems', yea, we went part ways and seldom meet each other anymore.
As a result, we weren't that close as we were, worse still was we like got nothing to talk when we meet occasionally.

1st week

2010-05-21T14:41:00.001+08:00

is over.
I can't stop believing that i counted an answer, and the answer was shrieking at me that it's a D, I picked A instead. How stupid. And that makes one of the careless mistakes in my Maths.

Teacher has finished marking Section A, for English. Fortunately and out of expectation my hard work repays! I heard that I've got 28, hopefully that's true. But quite a few of my friends got somewhere ranging around 20 - 23, which is not really good. The irony. I'm the one who seems like worrying the most after the exam, as I saw the time wrongly so I had not enough time to finish my Section B. (but still manage to write a simple conclusion, thanks Pn. Saroja for reminding us the remaining 5 minutes!! Or else...) So I'm feeling not good. It's like, people who like to complain much did well than people who don't complain. I know, and I have to admit, this happens on me very frequent. (But I don't complain my Section A!! haha.)
Seriously, I hope you all have a better mark in Section B. You all should have deserved much better than me in this part... Hopefully.

As for Sejarah, tips, or I should say the questions for Paper 2 leaked out like anything. Most of us study based on the tips given. I'm kinda impressed that there are still some people who are so independent decide to stand on themselves - they don't need the tips!! I've finished my Sejarah long ago, so I was like nothing to read yesterday. After lazing around half day I flipped through by reading the tips. No tips for paper 1 but I think I can score better in paper 1.

English essays, from Section A to Section B, the tips also spread like anything. I didn't receive the tips. Even if I receive tips for English, I will not follow it anyway, its like very 'fake', u know!

So all in all, I don't know what to tell but this is really not an exam... It's just a test for your memory, read what is given only, that's all. And I heard that such incidents happen every year without a fail, Trial will repeat the same procedure. By then, SPM will be very hard.
Because of the not-so-real-exam-orientated mid year examination, I'm like losing my urge to study (coz too fake!), I prefer listening songs throughout the day and waiting for the holidays. ><

Soooo so, work harder!! Not for the Trial's sake but for real SPM. o_O

I sincerely wish the best for all of you... ><

Tuk Tuk

2010-05-16T22:21:00.000+08:00

Being alone at home on the weekends is just like part of my Sunday routine.
Exam is near. Just two days from now.
BM and then followed by BI.
I have severe phobia on BI! I've got a B in GerakGempuh.
That makes me dilemma in between choosing story narrating or factual writing.
I'm unsure and indecisive, which to opt?

Last Teacher's Day falls on tomorrow. I'll be going to school.
I don't know about my classmates, I guess mostly are going, good if were to see the whole class attending.
I don't know what can be done there upon taking photos and slacking around. Ahaha.
But, still go, for fun.

I wasted my Sunday night for not doing revision. =/

Change for the better one

2010-05-04T22:32:00.003+08:00

I knew this would happen.
I never expect it comes now.
Knowing something that is not pleasant during an unpleasant time is a very sad case.
I cannot deny, my communication skills sucks.
I didn't know I can hurt so much people at this uncertain time...
I cannot make myself to be the same with my friends, they just being treated differently from me, even though we are almost the same boat. This is true, I sensed it long ago, I kept it deep inside not intended to reveal, to prevent the problems from getting severe.
What I get is what I deserve, yong suei
I'll make a change, for the better one.

Be calm. I'm rasional. I should focus on my studies. =)

May

2010-05-02T23:51:00.002+08:00

The stress is rising in the atmosphere. Once again, exam season is on.
The last final exam was October 2009, hmm, 7 months had passed...
But I watched Pokemon episodes series instead. It was quite touching still. And it's cute!! Hahahaha. Maybe that's a kind to relief, no, to channel out study stress? =)
Can't believe I have to start my revision now. Can I do better in midterm instead of regaining what I got in the previous monthly tests? ):

I've got a running nose and that leads to breathing difficulties.

My inbox message is already full. So I have to delete the older ones, and terdesak to delete my birthday wishes from friends. Sinful.

Idea has got to be submitted on Wednesday. I wonder how are my juniors doing. Hope they're really fine. =/

I hope there will be more people to attend MUT on the coming Saturday, even though it's exam season.

Should I start my driving lesson earlier? Or after exam? I cannot achieve a balance between academic and other stuffs right now, feeling so lost. -.-

I forgot that I still have a swimming lesson to go, and the trainer asked me to settle the classes by May, I even promised them before that. =X Should I go for it?

Almost all radio stations are like playing the same songs for whole day. They can play a same song up to 8 times per day.

I hope I can stay cool and steady like what I always do during Form 3 and Form 4. =)

I dreamed my ex-BC teacher yesterday. She drove me to a class gathering. LOL.

Somehow I miss my class. I had not been entering class for 2 days, it will be the 3rd day tomorrow. I missed a lot of fun and sadness as well. Class teacher commented on our essays sharply and badly, everyone was in a gloomy state; When there is no teacher, everyone gathered around and talked about Pokemon pula. What a class.

Strive hard, all. =D

Pokemon Fever!!

2010-04-30T23:46:00.002+08:00

Pokemon freak!!
Class is currently in a pokemon fever.
Pokemon doesn't meant solely for infant or children.
Now the wildfire spreads through the class!!
A bunch of 17 years old adolescent had their happy moments when the teacher not in class, and what fun they had was all randomly about pokemon. Zzz
I missed the fun okay, I had been busy lately.
Running through the HICT, seeing some debates drama where almost every year is the same. Ahaha.
Finalist: Catholic vs KwangHua.
The drama will proceed on the next Monday. Final. And 4S1 4S2 4S3 5S1 5S2 have the chance to go HICT again.
Initially it was opened for 3A 3B, but I requested for Form 5 instead. =X
So my classmates thanked my BC teacher but not me. XD What a deed.
So back to pokemon. I still don't know which character am I, currently I changed my display picture to Bulbasaur. There are a lot more. Wee Minn Charmander... Wei Neng Machop... Thuan Song Onix... Wency Vulpix... Jessie Ninetails... Voltrob... Jingglypuff... Mankey and etc etc la.
Haha.
Change your display picture once you found your character in pokemon! XD

Mid year examination, 18 days.
=(
Got back the massive destructive English paper. I had done badly, tremendously bad.
22/35 for Section A, which is still normal in class.
30/50 for Section B, which I don't satisfy.
Aiks I know I did not deserve a better result from my teacher, my English level ain't high, just so so.
But still, slightly crestfallen. X.x
Even got a B for BC and A2 for Bio. Not really good, I 'officially' screwed my exam. XD

Tomorrow is Labour day!
My parents go for a cruise with grandma. So home is sort of quiet.
A conducive study environment. XD Am I able to concentrate?

Massive destruction.
Brilliant academic performance.
I will bear in my mind. T.T

Forgetful

2010-04-16T23:45:00.002+08:00

Misbehaved.
I have been so much forgetful recently.
I left my Sejarah textbook at school today and called up a lot of friend seeking for help, at the end I had to trouble EeNix.
Thanks for the help, I will belanja you next week. ahaha. =D
It's really my fault anyway, I shouldn't be so forgetfullll!!! That will be the last time I supposed.

Musics.
Classmates were talking about musics.
Class medley which was actually a real crap (LOL.)
And what's good is that MH says she likes some songs solely because of the background music instead of the whole songs. I tried to understand what she says by listening them by my own and it was kinda true. =D
Music rox! =D

祸从口出，病从口入

2010-04-04T18:39:00.002+08:00

看回了一些朋友之前的一些部落格帖子。
再一次发现说错话极可能带来的危害性。
哈哈

所谓

祸从口出，病从口入

本身也经历过如此的情况，确实是我的错。
或许说话说漏了真正含义，亦可能自己太坦率。
搞得自己不开心，又将一段友谊陷下僵局。不值得。
我不知道，但是近来从毫几个来源发现，我是个“人缘很好，交际广阔”的人。
哈哈，有点受宠若惊，但是实际方面来说，除了爱讲话之外，我只不过是不大善于处理人际关系的人，所以才会把自己推入火坑。-.-
重提这些话，可能是自己介意，可能是不想重犯同样的错误。
所以，会时时以自己的经历作为一个借鉴，希望再也没有下次。
谨以上诉名句，奉劝大家。XD

long.

2010-03-31T19:19:00.002+08:00

Fruitful March!! It's about to end.
I can still remember the first day of March, Meei Huey accidentally terseliuh her left leg and did not come to school for a few days. Lol. It was 30 days ago.

March. School held a kem kepimpinan for those AJK tertinggi in clubs, units, or houses to attend. The objective was obvious, to inculcate sikap pemimpin in among yourselves. It did not work on me, it was truly failed. Haha. What I did was all crap, and even created a self-MSN, inviting all those people who sat around me, started a stupid conversation. -.-
Pengawas and us cheat during a quiz, er, for one question only. But then, ended up we got caught also. *Proud :D* That was something like 25 days ago.

So. SPM 2009 results being announced on the 11th March 2010. Some of my seniors did kinda good, while some, they did not put effort so they are still satisfied with the outcome. Glad. Situation was chaotic(?), and it brought 'emoness' to my class. No, not to say emoness, maybe some AWARENESS. To remind you to stop fooling around, start focusing on your studies, no more co-curicullar, no more playing, study like a nerd!!! Haha. Sooo it will be our turn SOON. 6 months from now. shit So that was about 20 days ago.

13th and 14th. Great. Mentioned on the previous posts. Passed my undang and had fun with friends on the Saturday. =D Birthday marathons started this day. XD
My birthday was normal. I got to wake up early in the morning for "Bad Romance" practice. 8am. I received a lot of sms at the night before so I was replying them until I only slept at 1.30am. LOL. Freaking tired. After the dance, went Aeon with kawan. Actually it was bored, I'd prefer going someone's and talk whole day. Haha. But we still managed to SS ourselves. -.- After the singing, I went swimming pula. After swimming, went tuition pula. So the day was packed!! I was 17 indirectly(?). But still kebudak-budakan. And I flipped through the last year's birthday wishes, I was a "16岁了，虽然长相不像”, yeah, couldn't believe, my height doesn't tell me I'm a seventeen too. XD That was 15 days ago.

17th and 18th. Got 文学 class in the morning. From 8am to 12pm. T_T BORED. But thanks to On, he brought cheerfulness to the class, haha. Damn a lot wey. 17th, went Aeon with kawan again. Haha. But for a window shop, with bee kee, ray and sien. Sien is the costume advisor. -.- Shopped nothing, but gained something. After sien leaving, the two of them belanja-ed me drinks @ Starbucks. Haha. =D Thanks!! And, they gave me a puzzle-liked photoframe, which I thought it was a sunglasses initially, *shocked* coz it was put in a sunglasses plastic bag. Haha. Talked a lot there, 2 hours at least.
18th, after 文学, went Secret Recipe @ Centro pula to have quick lunch. After that Hokkien Association to ready for the final preparation. Tired day!!

22nd. Back to school. =( PBC stuff. The problem comes. The letter received. Someone's leaving, forever. I thought he would change his mind and stay after the 319. But well, it doesn't. So this is actually a good friend of mine, since last year. Due to some conflicts, and stress, and some problematic problems, lol, we didn't get along so often. And I'm sure after the leaving, we don't have any other topics to chat about. lol! I'm not sure what's wrong. This is the 5th person who left the club anyway, is that our fault? Our leading method was wrong? Us to be blamed? I don't know, but I feel sad if you could not understand why we scolded, as we're just elder than you for one year, we expect you to know. ): So finally I understand how it feels when I asked swee heng the question last year, during the PD trip. I understand why she would attack me with sentence like "why would you ask something so brainless?", I never mentioned this, but now I really understand! I was BRAINLESS! So now people memper-brainless-kan me. LOL. XD Anyway, let bygones be bygones, we have to keep moving on, even though there's so much circumstances that defeat our semangat, I'm glad that I received some sms or words like "I must do my best during wywh!!" from Form 5. I'm happy that I see all of you like smiling(?) when the 319 camp over. I thought we won't be feeling any happiness or what, but it did on us, why? =D

23rd, the 6S kawan gave me a shirt and a photoframe as present! =D The shirt reminds me of graduation again. Haha.
Class gave the March babies a small party, Big Apple Doughnut. I go OMG!! I have to finish it up even tho I hate the doughnut that much! Cannot 辜负人家的一番好心 mah! >< Thanks anyway, I really appreciate. =)
24th, formal wear from friends sitting in front of me. =X It was nice!! My first formal shirt. Haha. I'll wear it when the time comes. XD
Then unexpected, present from chee seng, bing, kk, weeminn and jia wei. XD Adidas slanting bag and Icon pencil box.
A while more, birthday card wishes from class. XD Some of you asked me questions, I didn't know how to reply lah... Come ask me when you free, I dont know how to reply through words. Haha.
THANKS!
Dunno why but since last week, our class like to play a stupid stupid game.
"(Calling someone's name)"
"(Expecting the people to say 'har'?) HAR?"
(Then laugh non stop)
If not,
" XX, 你哈就是猪(super speed) "
" 哈？ "
(LOL non stop again)
So, that was 7 days ago.

27th. Earth Hour. lol. Had a great time @ Janice's place. It was long time ago since the last outing. =) it started only at 7pm, ended at 11pm, short, we were like kept taking photos/makan everywhere instead of doing other things else? And... I thought you all said wan swimming! Baju pun tak bawa pula, makan janji!!! So we played candle also la, somemore we lost a box of very expensive muffins, run through the Centro, from 99 to Shepherdoo, found nothing. My instinct told me it was at somewhere near the swimming pool, but Bee Kee's was somewhere near Shepherdoo. End up, perfect idea from Olivia, view back the previous photos to see if where we left the muffins. WAH. It works. We left it SOMEWHERE NEAR THE SWIMMING POOL - PLAYGROUND! Haha. So, the girls ran like chicken(?) from Centro main entrance up to the playground there. Fooh. Luckily we got it back. So dramatic. And hey, that shows my instinct was 50% zhun k? :D
That was 4 days ago.

Latihan Berfokus is near. I believe most of our classmates are ready. And I'm about to study soon!! Hope this berfokus can really make me fokus. XD Well, nerd mode gotta switch on!! ):

Facebook Group :

BORN TO PARTY,FORCED TO STUDY.

lol.

Lifeless

2010-03-22T19:16:00.002+08:00

5.30am routine is back.
Everyone seems to suffer from the stupid laziness disease.
I skipped my BM replacement tuition today, malas.
And I'm not going today Add Maths tuition, malas.
Will go on Thursday, malas.
Tuition work to be completed on tomorrow, undone, malas.
I want to spend more time sitting on sofa and relaxing, malas.
I want to spend more time doing something that I like other than schooling, tuition stuff, malas.
I want to sleep more, I don't have a good sleep throughout the March holiday, malas.
I hope I can have superb speed and complete all the undone stuff right now, malas!

SALAM kepada MALAS!

kk, stop blabbering.

Pleasant day!

2010-03-20T13:35:00.002+08:00

My holiday officially starts today!!
Yeah only today and it will last for two days only. ): School resume on Monday!

Day camp held at Hokkien Association yesterday!
The day before yesterday was tiring as I had only completed all my last minute job at that moment. T_T
And the dance practice was terrible I think. Frankly speaking it worsen our friendship during the preparation. -.-
Then I was completely exhausted when I went back home. Took a long nap and it doesn't seem to help much. I'm still tired!!
So after worrying so much about the sijil, name tag and registration stuff, I off to bed at 12am.

The early morning of the camp was normal. Obviously everyone was still sleepy and so did I.
I was the emcee so I had to force myself to be semangatttt!!
Ended up I was ss-ing with Shin Hui at the stage there, for about 15 minutes, only then the campers started to show me response. Haha.
I guessed I did a bad job for emcee yesterday. >< Too informally done. ):
So, I did not involve in any station games or group leaders. I loitered around when the games on! Surprisingly the games went on smoothly. Haha. And the game masters... Pro!!!!! Especially those at the art gallery there. Ahaha. Water games, thrilling. But the weather was too hot so I didn't intend to stay there and watch the game proceeded.
So...
After the game had ceramah session again. I couldn't concentrate so I crapped a lot there. Stupid Khye Siang kept mentioning gay gay and ahgua ahgua stuff. Grrr -.- XD
The night was awesome!! I didn't manage to watch all the performances, I still could feel how good they done. At least, they tried. There was a group of people who told me they would like to give up the chance to perform as they did not have sufficient time for preparation, Sien disallowed them to do so, and so they're still performing there with a kinda good outcome! XD
But then after that I only got to know they did not want to perform because of some kesulitan, their ketua seemed like went against their idea or what. lol. Quite sway actually if really so. =X

As mentioned, I just could feel the outside environment in the prayers room, I was preparing for the Bad Romance dance!! Gahhh. The disastrous dance has almost come to a stop! Outcome was good, everyone was in the beat, PHEW~ Big round of applause!!
Feeling damn happy as everyone enjoyed seeing this dance too, at least... Usaha tidak disia-siakan. Haha. Seriously I finally can understand how 台下十年功，台上五分钟 that kind of feeling. Upon remembering how hard we pulled through just to have a nice performance: Going to Sze Chin's house on every Wednesday and Thursday night, even though tired after staying back and left our homework undone. XD Sighhh~~~ It paid off :D!! So let's bury all the hatchets!!
Everything went on smoothly at night! =D

So, this was my 2nd time involved in the preparation. First time what I felt was normal, I was involved in the Persembahan group. 2nd time, I'm the SU of the camp. I thought it was an easy-peasy job as I could type so fast. Ahahahaha. But I was wrong, there are still a lot of stuffssss that you didn't expect, waiting for you! >< I'm glad that I've done it almost perfect with Chai Fong and Chern Luen's help!! Thank you!!! Some Kapar and KU girls involved in this for the 2nd time too, so there's not much problem cooperating with them... As we already known each other. Got to know some new friends, mostly from ACS. Haha. They are good and helpful. =D XD Last but not the least, I love you Kwang Hua Form 5!!! Zhang Yik, Si En, Bee Ying, Yin Yean, Yung Wen, Yann Herng, Jia Wai, Ven Siew, Xuan Hui, Sze Chin... and those who didn't attend/participate in the AJK list. The environment was great, the camp further enhanced our friendship/cooperation and most importantly, we all gained the spirit to go for WenYuWanHui!!!!! 2nd of July!!! The last grand activity we will be holding... We have got to do our all might and bestest job there!!!!!! Form 4 juniors, you all are just great!! We can see that you all played your role in the camp too, glad to see that you all grow matured from years to years!!! Hahaha~

The overall process, from 16th January until 19th March, was just superb!!! I like the whole process, from not knowing each other until we talked crap and sometimes jokes. XD And ya, thanks Chay Hou for the ride on Thursday! =D Hope to keep in touch and see you guys on the 庆功宴!!!

KwangHua Form 5, keep the spirit on!! And remember our last, final upcoming grand activity!! XD

11th - 12th

2010-03-15T00:50:00.002+08:00

购买了一些Camp必备的东西。
整个购买过程中，碰巧般地朋友也正要买一样的物品。
我购买的数量不多，所以凑上她的，加起来应该可以扣更多。
值得，所以订货，下午再过来付钱领货。

刚领货的那一刻，我就拨电话给那位朋友。
交待了一切，心里终于少了一样负担。phew~~

但是...

到了11点，突然间手机闪出一个号码，听了之后...
“啊... 你买了？？”
天啊，这一通电话直接把我送入瓶颈。
不是说好要买了吗，哪里可以反悔呢？
不过我也不清楚事情的来龙去脉，但确定的就是早早说好要买了。
所以当时陷入一片低潮。
这些买回来货物怎么办？
辗转难眠的11号...

12号那天，很不好意思地向别的persatuan/unit询问，看看谁是否有兴趣买？
结果看得出有人一脸爱莫能助，很想帮助我们，可是能力上好像又不允许。
而说真的，这种情况令我们更心酸、更不好意思！:P
哈哈。
下课之后，我领回钱了，至少可以向父母给个交待了。
但是，事情中同时延伸了矛盾。
原本只是一心好意，顺便帮朋友买下，不用让人家故意走一趟。
可是到最后事情好象越来越复杂，回到最初的原点来思考，其实，只要我买我自己的份，不久不会有这种问题了吗？
唉... 好人真难做！=(
而钱的问题，确实把我们两方带到一个低潮。T_T
难怪人家说讲钱伤感情！
幸好的是事情的严重性，并没有牵涉到伤感情的地步。哈哈。XD
只是会觉得很不好意思，因为一时的好心？亦或者一时的假聪明，拖累了自己，也拖累大家。

啊！
一时觉得自己也有错，所以良心发现。
在那些多出来得分量当中，我又买了30个，作为自己日后用途吧！

而在思考这件事情的时候，翻阅课本，突然发现上面写着三个字：
“笨到爆！”

-.-

Over the moon!!

2010-03-14T14:56:00.002+08:00

Burden for undang thingy has finally dropped!!
45/50!!
Woohoo!
Hahaha.
It took me 2 days to study but 17 minutes for answering! ><
Well, perfunctory efforts still paid. PHEW~

Amali.
And driving lessons!!!
Gah, I don't want to knock on anything during my driving!! ><
Droom droom~ Haha...

Report on my recent life

2010-03-12T23:44:00.003+08:00

One week of break starts today!!
Went Hokkien Association for the same stuff, practising meeting and mostly discussion.
19th March is soon. ><><><

DMC performance, nice, successful, and nevertheless, I'm jealous with their effort. Ahahaha. True la, when can PBC gain back the spirit? Anyway, it was really a great job, I personally like the first and second drama, keep up the good work!! =)

Went to open air western food place to have our dinner after that, I didn't manage to stay with friends for long after that. X.x Parents have their friends' wedding dinner right now, and that's why I had to leave earlier. Awww. x.X So, satu orange juice, dengan RM2.00, after some topics, and some photos taken, then I said Bye! T_T Hope the next time is coming soon. XD

March!!! Birth month!! Haha. I was expecting something to do, or somewhere to hang out during next Tuesday. But after revising my schedule, yeah I don't have much time to loiter around. Freakinggg busy and so do everyone!! So, if I could have a nice rest at home, by then that would be very enough. Haha. So nevermind la, it could be my birthday everyday if I want to. XD And ya, 17th! I want to get license as soon as po!! I'm going to undang test tomorrow, sh*t, gotta make sure that I pass the test, with 45/50. I'm reading, but nothing goes into my brain, hmm!!!!

Very great, I get tanned somemore today. Brilliant charcoal!!

13th of March, Happy birthday to Vanessa and Boon Keong!! =D
And then Happy Birthday to Yung Wen. Ahahaha.

Kk, going to read up the undang thingy, I wish I can understand some stupid akta thingy and at least memorise them for a day. XD

火车．换站

2010-02-26T01:24:00.004+08:00

几经忙碌的日子，多少时间从我们紧握拳头的手指缝间流逝了。
哈哈，朋友不断告诉我，我们所剩的就是七个月时间。
真不愿意被提醒。

一月份、二月份的日子，应该说多姿多彩吧？
从我们单纯地以为可以不用在bilik ceramah上课，到现在慢慢习惯了，甚至开始设计桌子了！
到一月份rumah sukan，我不知道凭了什么我被选为一个wakil tingkatan 5出来。
那天还真的吓倒一跳，不过我答应了我会尽我的全力来帮助rumah A，虽然不是重大人物啦。
不知道是力不从心，还是我根本没有融入的空间，我觉得这还不是我的最好而已。
所以，怎么也好心里也会有一点过不去。但是如果有什么忙要帮的，还是可以来找我的！

一月份，福建会馆的交流营活动也展开了。第一次会议进行得...如火如荼？
哈哈，不知道怎么形容，但是一切还算是顺利，期望319那天可以看到最好的一面！
文书不好当，当初我还以为可以一边玩电脑一边打字的，结果并不是这样的。
但无论如何，这一段时间还算是忙得开心！
是说，最后一年的感触很深，所以即使有几忙也不会像中三、四的时候这样会碎碎念！反而选择乐在其中。
所以这一段日子的星期六开始忙了起来，每次得到福建会馆开会了，也因此而牺牲掉参加NPC的机会，原本毫无动摇，不想参加，之后也不懂怎么了蠢蠢欲动，跃跃欲试，无奈一天只有24小时。=(
这个交流营，自己还玩过瘾答应人家自己perform一个舞蹈咯。真的是geh siao。哈哈。什么舞蹈？相信很多人都知道了。跳得真的有点辛苦，除了星期三、星期五晚上得练到11点，然后又要紧记舞步，不然就是动作不够美。319迫近，所以，除了加油，还是加油，这些辛勤的汗滴（？）最终将会变成一场美丽的梦！哈哈。除了交流营的筹备啊... 星期六还有3场开会赶着开，8点，应该会忙到3、4点，本来想参与bomba第一次的活动，结果事与愿违，还是专注于重要的一方吧。-.-
所以，你们也要加油！！

“最后一年了，敢敢参罢了啦。”
整个过程太棒了，尤其是看见志享拿着报名表格，拼命拉人参加辩论比赛，屡试屡败。到最后，也不知道为什么美琪、Olivia、诗明、伟钦会突然间从很坚决的“不要”，到后来看到他们的名字出现在思恩的组上。5S1，所谓的5骚1，就这样派出了3队代表：
1。思思队 - 思恩，美琪，Olivia，诗明，伟钦
2。随辩啦 - 志享，美芸，嘉俊，章毅，美惠
3。风云辩奏 - 彦亨，伟明，志成，伟能还有我
总共有八队参与，第一场，我们三队就那么侥幸的过关，哈哈。
所以来到半决赛，我们和思思队互相残杀，结果我们赢了。
到决赛，大家给于挺大的压力，但同时也给于不少支持，很谢谢你们！！！
我们赢了！！！！
哈哈，原本只是抱着一种玩乐、吸取经验的心态而已，到最后竟然入围决赛！
三场下来都有着不同的滋味，紧张，害怕，退缩，懒惰，兴奋... -.-
然而，同时也有不少忘不了的回忆：
第一场：
- 对方盘问故意提起一个华文学会例子来激怒大家。==
- 那天很多人，结果我的主辨稿结束了大家给于热烈的欢呼，我的耳朵红掉了。XD
- 对方对辨很有潜质。
- 对方盘问提起的 SK-100。 -.-
- 还有很多个5s1一起喊的那时刻。
- 比赛完了竟然还和思思队喊“半决赛见”的那一刻。 ==
- 思思队压着学长组，学长组pekcek到呈稿口吃的时候。 >< 第二场：
- 美琪是一个很好的答辩手。
- 伟明的盘问显然进步了！
- Olivia 和我之间的盘问不知道出了什么问题，我听不懂她的，她听不懂我的，尴尬了两分钟。 >< - 伟能/伟钦："好，OK" 其他人：“伟能/伟钦，不要讲OK。” 伟能/伟钦：“哦哦， OK。” - 诗明和志成自由辩破声了上5、6次，笑得大家...... XD - 随辩啦出乎意料般地输了。第三场：
- 决赛前的气氛很是紧张。
- 班上同学放学了纷纷前来提早祝贺，不然给于祝福，很是感动。T_T
- 决赛场上没有观众，结果伟能做主席，然而Olivia和建翔的捧场没齿难忘。哈哈哈！
- 我觉得我的答辩环节时候还不赖！=D 但是主辨稿来不及呈完。
- Olivia 拍了照片。大家紧张和呆滞的样子.... -.-
- 志成终于没啥破声。
- 比赛还在进行时说道了庆功宴。 =X
- 比赛一结束马上sms告知成绩。啊哈哈哈哈~
就酱，原本玩玩而已，到最后进入了决赛开始发觉了我们的责任。T_T
星期二那天在图书馆，说得一大堆废话，然后讨论时间才不到1小时就散了。
很庆幸这场有心无力的准备没有白费。哈哈，也为本班同学荣获了一个新名誉？值得的！！
切记，胜勿骄。 -.-
我在等庆功宴！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！

新年到的时候我还真的没啥感觉。一直到了大年初五，发现新年开始了！！
但是我一直当那个星期为普通假期而已。
初五到东禅寺做义工，人生中的第一次，但是经验难得！！
在这之前我们四处游逛，拍了很多照片，走走喝喝，感觉不错。
天气炎热，我们五点开始化妆，我、抡温、建翔被画成一副老虎脸，极大牺牲。-.-
当然是被笑得... 十分不像话。哈哈。
还成为了当天拍照对象，因为我是第二只出品的老虎仔！
游行晚上9.30才开始，所以呢，化装之后我们就在休息室里待上了4小时。
说闲话，玩电话，聊学校的事情，吃晚餐……
所以时间也不知不觉流走了...
9.30分开始了，10点结束。
整个过程是四处相机，我只是负责拿旗，所以也没什么人注意我。哈哈！
整个游行是成是败，我不确定，但是人潮汹涌，挤得我们游行要过的路也变得很狭窄。><
幸好只遇上一个熟人。哈哈哈哈哈！

....... 待续

不想写什么

2010-02-24T00:54:00.001+08:00

每一次就是要等到那么夜深人静的时候才会有idea要写些什么。
还不想荒废掉这个部落格，但回头想想我也不是什么著名的部落格专家，写来做什么呢？= =
感觉来了，可是时间不对，还是早一点睡吧~~~
对了，今天总有一股凡事被蒙在鼓里的感觉！
这感觉让我不愉快了半天... -.-
不过没有事了啦，纯粹写来发泄~~~~
哈哈。
早一点睡吧。
晚安！